#WeekendCoffeeShare (May 4, 2025)

Posted on by Astrid

Hi everyone. I’m once again joining #WeekendCoffeeShare on Sunday, as yesterday, I had a busy day and was too tired to write.

Today’s the day we commemorate Dutch people who died in World War II (and in every war, conflict and maybe they now count terrorist attacks too since). Only 5% of Dutch people currently were alive during our liberation on May 5, 1945. I never was all that much of a May 4 and 5 follower, but I have over the past few years learned to be more mindful of the freedom and rights I and those I love have, since they are more and more being threatened. For this reason, I think I’m going to do the two minutes of silence at 8PM this year. I hope I’ll have finished my post by then. I’ve just had dinner, so no coffee for me, but I’d love to offer you a drink.

If we were having coffee, first I’d talk about the weather. On Wednesday, we had our first day when, at the national weather institute in De Bilt, the temperature climbed to above 25°C. On Thursday, here it even got to 28°C. I read that the first day of temps above 25°C usually doesn’t happen until mid-May. I appreciated it though. Today, the daytime temp didn’t get above 13°C.

If we were having coffee, then I’d tell you I’ve done a lot of walking again, as well as riding the side-by-side bike. My May challenge on my Apple Watch is to double my movement goal twice. I already did it once so far, so that should be ridiculously easy.

If we were having coffee, then I’d share that one of the sick staff whom I’d made the polymer clay frog for last week, let me know via her colleague that she was really happy with it. I had originally asked another staff to pass the frog for the other sick staff on to her. Then, on Tuesday, that staff said it may be nice for the two of us to pop by the sick staff’s house on Wednesday so that I could personally give the frog to her. I did ask the staff whose idea this was to text her colleague to ask her permission for us to stop by, since some care workers with good reason don’t want clients to know where they live. Now I for one never even look up my staff online and would certainly not violate their living space. The sick staff gave her permission so one of the side-by-side bike rides was to there. The staff’s kids were home too and one of them asked me where I live. I, being awkward with young kids that I am, originally mentioned the institution town and then said I lived at [staff’s name]’s work, only to realize that [staff’s name] is “Mommy” to the kid.

If we were having coffee, I’d share that the other side-by-side bike ride was to a market once again. I resisted the urge to buy something, as I’d already been to the supermarket on Monday and I reasoned even just strolling the market is a nice experience. Besides, we did have lunch at a fish diner.

If we were having coffee, then I’d share I’m still struggling with the temp worker situation and how much energy goes into explaining everything to them. Sometimes, I think staff get me, while at other times, it seems as though they’re absolutely clueless.

If we were having coffee, lastly I’d tell you that, yesterday, I went to Nijmegen for a cerebral palsy meeting again. It wasn’t the nationwide CP day. That had been in early April but was held in a city that’s a two-hour journey from here, so I hadn’t gone there. Nijmegen is about a 45-minute drive in good traffic. This meeting lasted three hours total and there was no theme. Rather, we gathered in a restaurant and had lunch and some drinks and just chatted. I have met many of the participants a few times before, but there were a few newcomers too. With one of them, I chatted almost the entire time, because we had so much in common. She recommended a few resources to me too.

After the meeting, I had decided to go to my best friend’s parents’ house (ack, “in-laws” is a lot shorter 😉). My best friend picked me up in Nijmegen and drove us there. My best friend’s sister was there for a bit too with her one-year-old son. I really don’t do well with kids, although this one is a lot less loud than my nieces.

I didn’t get back to the institution until 8PM yesterday and went to bed shortly after 10PM. I’m honestly still quite tired.

#WeekendCoffeeShare (March 8, 2025)

Posted on by Astrid

Hi everyone on this International Women’s Day! I’m joining #WeekendCoffeeShare. It’s 7:30PM, so no more coffee for me. If you’d like a drink though, feel free to grab one and let’s chat.

If we were having coffee, first I’d talk about the weather. For most of the week, it’s been absolutely gorgeous! Today, we even reached 20°C. I know that this isn’t good news, in the sense that it’s way too warm for early March. I do care, but I also realize that I alone (or even all of the Netherlands alone) can’t stop or slow down climate change. For this reason, I’m enjoying the good weather while I can.

If we were having coffee, then I’d brag about all the physical activity I got in. Yesterday, I set a new record on my exercise minutes by exercising (mostly walking) for over three hours. I burned 600 active calories according to my Apple Watch.

Today, I didn’t walk as much, but still went for a few nice walks and I did ride the side-by-side bike. It’s an eBike and my staff had forgotten to check its battery level, so it quit working midway through our ride.

If we were having coffee, then I’d tell you that, on Thursday, my staff and I took a walk around the nearby lake. We also walked this route one day in late January and I remembered a little café along the way had the most delicious caramel pie. My partner looked at the menu on Wednesday and said the caramel pie wasn’t on it. Maybe it was the “pie of the week”. Thankfully, once at the café, my staff asked the waitress whether they still had the caramel pie and they did!

If we were having coffee, I’d tell you I am planning to create a trinket dish out of polymer clay soon. I ordered a cutter for it, which arrived on Monday. Unfortunately, my ceramic tile that I work on, is too small to cut out the shape on. However, one of my staff said she still had ceramic tiles somewhere and, thankfully, these were big enough. Haven’t gotten down to actually creating the trinket dish yet, because the weather’s just too beautiful.

If we were having coffee, I’d also share that, on Tuesday, a staff and I went for a walk around grounds again with the purpose of taking pictures of nature. There were mostly snowdrops and crocuses to be seen.



A few days later though, they’d mostly gone and the first daffodils could be spotted. No pics of those, as it was too sunny when I was out today.

If we were having coffee, I would conclude by saying this week overall was good. I had a few moments when I was in distress over the fact that there were quite a few temp workers, but the staff made sure always to assign me a regular staff. I realize it can’t always be this way and I’m okay with that, but I did tell my staff that my accepting a temp worker once out of necessity doesn’t make them a regular.

#WeekendCoffeeShare (October 12, 2024)

Posted on by Astrid

Hi everyone. I’m joining #WeekendCoffeeShare today. It’s nearly 9PM, so long past my last coffee break for the day. However, I’d be happy to pass you a virtual mug of your favorite beverage. My spouse is in search for pumpkin spice latte. Since my blog readership is mostly international, I doubt anyone could recommend a place to find it tomorrow local to here and my spouse can do a Google search too. Anyway, let’s have a drink and let’s chat.

If we were having coffee, I’d start by sharing about the weather. It’s been quite cool with daytime temps below 15°C most days. Today, the daytime high was as low as 12°C. Brrrr! We’ve also had some rain, though none today or yesterday. Next week, we’re supposed to get one day with a daytime temperature of 21°C. Sadly, rain is in the forecast then too.

If we were having coffee, I’d share that, this week, I did okay with my exercise. I didn’t meet my goal everyday, but I don’t care.

On Thursday, a staff and I were riding the side-by-side bike to a nearby town, so that I could pick up a package. (As regular readers of my blog know, package delivery to the institution is hit-or-miss, so I set up a pick-up point in the nearest town as my default delivery address with DHL.) The road leading directly to the town was under construction, so we headed another way. When we were in the next village, the bike got a flat tire. The staff called the home to have someone else pick me up by car and he himself walked to the care home with the bike. It’s really frustrating, because this bike had just had major repairs.

If we were having coffee, I’d share that I did pick up the package yesterday. When in that town, we noticed it was market day. We decided to get some fried fish. Then, when coming to another stand, we heard something about an offer by which, if you’d bought something from four vendors, you could draw a prize, like a voucher. We went back to the fish stand and asked for them to sign our card too. I visited the fish stand like I said, the veggie/fruit stand (where I bought raspberries and lemons), the nuts stand and the olive stand. I then went to draw the prize and it was a €5 voucher. I spent that on licorice. Of course, most food at farmer’s markets is more expensive than at the supermarket, but I love the experience. By the way, if anyone has any ideas for what to do with lemons, your suggestions are welcome. I thought many smoothies had fresh lemon juice in them, but only a teaspoon or so and I have six lemons.

If we were having coffee, I’d tell you that I did a lot of baking over the past week. On Tuesday, I tried baking cookies from a store-bought mixture, but those didn’t turn out good. I then decided to give cookie baking another try on Wednesday, making the cookies from scratch. That was much better! Finally, today, I baked a cake. Don’t tell my dietitian, as I’ve probably gained weight. Weight management can wait.

If we were having coffee, lastly I’d tell you that I got a new day schedule. It doesn’t look much different, but there are some significant improvements. For example, it’s now clear who will be supporting me during the day. The weekend schedule is also now the same as the weekday schedule. I haven’t yet read the schedule myself and, judging from what the staff are saying, it does need a few small tweaks. I’ll discuss this with my assigned staff soon.

Speaking of which, I got a new second assigned staff. I have had one staff as my assigned staff for a few months, but she only works one or two days a week. I now got one of the student staff as my secondary assigned staff. I think she’s quite good at her job despite just starting out.

#WeekendCoffeeShare (May 18, 2024)

Posted on by Astrid

Hi everyone. How are you doing? I’m joining #WeekendCoffeeShare again. It’s nearly 9PM Saturday, so I’ve long had my last cup of coffee for the day. If you’d like, I can offer you a cup of green tea, a glass of soda or some water though. Let’s have a drink and let’s catch up.

If we were having coffee, first as usual I’d talk about the weather. It’s been quite good with daytime temps most days around 22°C, sometimes higher. On Thursday, we did get a thunderstorm, which scares me.

If we were having coffee, I’d share that, as a result, I had no trouble meeting my movement goal on my Apple Watch each day. I went for walks each day. On Thursday, before the thunderstorm, I also actually rode the side-by-side bike for a little in the morning and then we cycled to Colmschate, a neighborhood of Deventer, the nearest city, in the afternoon. In total, I did 25km of cycling according to my Apple Watch. I reached double my movement goal that day.

If we were having coffee, next I’d say that, generally, Thursday was my best day of the week. I finally worked on a polymer clay project once again. The new student staff was being introduced to me so I decided to show her how I make a unicorn. I got distracted by the thunderstorm a lot, so the unicorn didn’t turn out as great as I’d hoped, but oh well.

If we were having coffee, I’d tell you that the rest of the week was a bit challenging. I’ve been struggling with attachment issues lately. I keep clinging to my “favorites” among the staff. I’ve decided I will discuss this with the behavior specialist when I’m having en appt with her and my mother-in-law on Tuesday, as it really needs to stop for my and the staff’s sake. I mean, I’m allowed to have preferences re staff I get along with, but my anxiety around them abandoning me and the resulting distress isn’t healthy and besides, it might just lead to that exact thing if they feel I’m too clingy.

If we were having coffee, finally I’d share that my spouse and I were trying to figure out ways for seeing each other over the weekend, since due to Pentecost all shops and lunchrooms are closed on Sunday and Monday. I finally came up with the idea of traveling to our house by ParaTransit on Monday. I haven’t been there since Christmas. It should really be cool.

#WeekendCoffeeShare (May 11, 2024)

Posted on by Astrid

Hi everyone. Today I’m joining #WeekendCoffeeShare. It’s been a long week, honestly, so time for a cup of coffee, green tea or a smoothie. Let’s have a drink and let’s catch up.

If we were having coffee, first I’d talk about the weather. It’s been quite warm and sunny most days, with daytime highs around 20°C. Tomorrow, the temperature is even supposed to reach 25°C. The mornings have been cooler though, as it’s not yet July, obviously. Which makes me think, with temperatures like this in May, will we get a soaring hot summer again? Most likely. I love warm weather, but it’s not like I want summertime temps over 35°C.

If we were having coffee, I’d tell you I’ve been walking a fair bit over the past week. I also rode the side-by-side bike yesterday. We finally figured out how to make it so that I can actually push the pedals properly rather than just moving along with the person who’s on the steering side of the bike.

If we were having coffee, I would tell you that, on today’s morning walk, we came by the intensive support home and several clients were calling out to me. I decided to come over and join them in their backyard. Eventually, one of the staff who did work there when I still lived there, joined us and offered me a cup of coffee. I think that’s nice!

If we were having coffee, I’d share that, finally, it looks like my orthopedic shoes are actually good to wear. The last adjustment was to the front, which scratches the ground due to my ever-worsening drop foot, causing the shoe to need repairing almost on a weekly basis. Now, it’s not like it doesn’t still scratch the ground and get damaged, but not nearly as much as it used to. And the big positive: I can actually wear these shoes without getting blisters. Like, okay, that’s normal, but I only used to be able to wear my specific brand of walking shoes and I’d get blisters from everything else, including every pair of orthopedic shoes I’ve tried before. I have actually been wearing these shoes most of the day for the past few days without a problem.

If we were having coffee, I’d report that, speaking of my drop foot, the physical therapist has been here. We went for a 20-minute walk, during which I didn’t walk with a drop foot as much as before, thankfully. It hasn’t had me convinced that my mobility isn’t worsening, but at least it isn’t as bad as I’d feared. I mean, it could just be normal aging with mild cerebral palsy.

If we were having coffee, I would share that I bought yet another pair of new headphones. Originally, I wasn’t intending on giving up on my AirPods, but because they keep losing connectivity to my computer, I needed headphones that come with a wired option. Well, guess what? The wired option for the JBL Tune 770NC headphones isn’t all that awesome, but the headphones don’t lose connection to my computer when connected via Bluetooth. Besides, it can be connected to both my iPhone and computer at the same time. How I wish I’d known about these before buying the AirPods, that were literally three times the price of these headphones.

If we were having coffee, I’d share that I also finally replaced my desk chair. I got a gaming chair. That’s the reason I have been wearing my orthopedic shoes all day: the chair is too high for me to sit on without shoes on. Other than that though, it’s much better than my previous chair.

I also ordered a table and two chairs for in my little backyard. These weren’t in stock at the store I went to, so I’ll have to come back to collect them. While at that store, I saw a really cute unicorn soft toy and just had to get it.

If we were having coffee, lastly I’d admit that I have been struggling with my mental health again and, as a result, haven’t been too inspired in the creative department recently. I do really hope to get back into the groove soon. I did, last week, buy some kitchen tools, like measuring spoons and a sugar/flour sieve. I’ve only used the measuring spoons for smoothie making so far, but that’s a start at least.

Gratitude List (April 26, 2024) #TToT

Posted on by Astrid

Hi everyone. How have you been? I’m participating in Ten Things of Thankful with a gratitude post once again. It’s been a while. I however have quite a few thankfuls to share, I think, so let’s go.

1. I’m grateful for homemade pizza. My spouse, mother-in-law and I made it together at my in-laws’ house (my father-in-law wasn’t there) last Saturday after the CP conference.

2. I’m grateful for a side-by-side bike ride on Sunday. I was assigned an extremely tall staff member for my one-on-one and, for those not aware, I am short myself. This makes walking with him quite a challenge, as we haven’t yet figured out a way for him to guide me that doesn’t cause me pain. However, I came up with the idea of biking instead.

3. I am grateful for the fact that my attempt at making overnight oats on Monday turned out to be a success! Last time I made them, I added way too much milk.

4. I am grateful because, on Tuesday, I was able to cook köfte for my fellow residents and staff. It took me quite some time, but that’s not a problem.

5. I am grateful for French fries on Wednesday. Oh, I’m making more than half of this list about food, but okay.

6. I am grateful for an opportunity to go swimming yesterday. I had gone swimming twice last week, once with my own home’s residents and once with a small group. I hadn’t expected to be able to join the small group this week again and swimming for my home was canceled because most residents were on the annual trip. However, I was able to join the small group anyway.

7. I am grateful for a trip to the institution museum this afternoon. It’s a really small museum, but it was interesting to learn about the history of the institution. Plus, we got free mini pancakes! Oh wait, that’s another food-related thankful…

8. I’m grateful for a day without rain today. We had rain most of the week and, though I could go on walks everyday inbetween showers, I couldn’t go out nearly as much as I’d have liked. Today though was a rain-free day and we even had a bit of sunshine.

9. I am grateful for an appointment with the nurse practitioner who works at my local GP practice re my decreasing mobility. I’ll have a physical therapy appt soon too but I’d really like to know what’s causing my mobility impairment (CP or something else) and whether a decrease in mobility is to be expected or what can be done about it.

10. Last but not least, I am so grateful I seem to be slowly crawling out of the pit of depression I was in.

Gratitude List (September 29, 2023) #TToT

Posted on by Astrid

Hi everyone. This week has been tough, but there’s light at the end of the tunnel. Let me share a gratitude list. As usual, I’m joining in with Ten Things of Thankful (#TToT).

1. I am grateful for warm and cozy pajamas. They’re probably a size too big and the sleeves and legs are too long, but they’re really snuggly.

2. I’m grateful for warm enough weather that I can still wear short-sleeved shirts during the day.

3. I am grateful for the care home’s side-by-side bike. Unlike my previous care home, the new one has its own side-by-side bike for all residents to use. At my previous care home, one fellow client had one and, though I could occasionally borrow it, that didn’t always feel right. Besides, she is significantly taller than me, so her bike was too large for me. So was the side-by-side bike we sometimes borrowed for my physical therapy. I am, for this reason, grateful my current care home’s side-by-side bike can be adjusted to fit my size.

4. I am grateful for speculoos (known as Biscoff in the United States if I’m correct). I have been enjoying this a lot lately. Which reminds me, I need to locate the recipe for Biscoff brownies I once saw on Reddit.

5. I am grateful for sleep. With the exception of last night, I slept quite well here at the new care home most nights.

6. I am grateful for a productive dietitian’s appt on Wednesday. I am sort of grateful for my weight. I say “sort of” because it’s within the healthy range but lower than my and my dietitian’s agreed-upon lower weight goal. Honestly, there are really just two voices competing in my head: one that says this weight is still healthy so scriew my goals and let’s lose more, and one that worries that something medical is going on because I am not restricting at all.

7. I am grateful my staff aren’t really pushing me to be in the living room more. I am also grateful that I can be there sometimes.

8. I am grateful my staff listen to my concerns about the cuts to my one-on-one support and are trying to make things work as best as they can.

9. I am grateful my old home’s behavior specialist also took my and my mother-in-law’s concerns seriously and is going to inform my current home’s behavior specialist.

10. Most of all, I am grateful for a new day schedule. This looks surprising in light of my previous two points, but hear me out. After both me and the staff raising our concerns, my one-on-one was for now raised back to the level it was at my previous care home. This does apparently mean the care home get less money than they spend on me. I for now dropped my wish to actually see the financial paperwork in detail and will stop moaning about how my previous care home cut my budget and blamed the home in Raalte, which after all is as much a theory as the home in Raalte having spent money they didn’t have. Anyway, with my one-on-one back to the old level, my new assigned staff designed an even slightly better day schedule for me than the one at my previous care home. I now will have a 75-minute activity time slot in the afternoon. This should be enough for a medium-level (for me) polymer clay project. Or for baking the aforementioned Biscoff brownies.

Gratitude List (July 20, 2023)

Posted on by Astrid

Hi everyone. I’m feeling like I have really been neglecting my blog. The truth is I’ve been struggling a lot, more so even than I used to. However, today I’m feeling pretty good so I’m taking the opportunity for a gratitude post. Here goes.

1. I am grateful for a fellow resident’s birthday celebration on Monday. Just after handover at 3PM, we all sat in the living room and sang “Happy Birthday” for him. We had fries and a snack for dinner too. Unfortunately, another resident did have a severe anger outburst right after we did the singing and was disruptive for the rest of the evening even when in his room.

2. I am grateful that, though on Tuesday I got the least familiar to the group staff assigned to me for my one-on-one, she was not the least familiar to me.

3. I am grateful for a comforting visit from my mother-in-law on Tuesday. It was good to be able to vent to her.

4. I am grateful for a delicious caramel ice cream bowl that my mother-in-law treated me to on her visit. Okay, my dress once again had ice cream and caramel sauce all over it, but oh well, it can be washed.

5. I am grateful for a satisfying dietitian’s appt on Wednesday. She was really content with my weight (which remains within the agreed-upon range) and my eating and exercising habits. For those who don’t know, I have a history of disordered eating, bordering on bulimia, so I particularly need to make sure my eating and exercising don’t become compulsive (in addition to not engaging in purging behaviors, of course).

6. I am grateful my assigned staff supported me for part of the morning shift on Wednesday despite there being a temp worker too. Granted, the temp worker is quite familiar with the group, but I’d more or less been told that I’d still be assigned the temp worker by default unless there are literally four regular employees.

7. I am grateful for a great experience swimming yesterday. I went into the pool with just a staff and no other residents. This particular staff has this really cool way of getting my playful inner child out, so we sang songs, jumped up and down and had lots of fun.

8. I am grateful my assigned staff agreed to contact the behavior specialist once she’s back from vacation to set up a meeting to discuss possibly finding me help in overcoming my sense of basic mistrust. It’s been getting progressively worse and is affecting my life here at the care home but also my marriage.

9. I am grateful I was allowed to borrow a fellow resident’s side-by-side bike this afternoon. It was a nice change from walking.

10. I am grateful for my spouse, who sticks by me even though I’m being quite difficult. We’ve had a few arguments and I’ve crossed my spouse’s limits a few times. I now realize this is probably my anxious attachment style getting in the way of our healthy communication. For this reason, I’m all the happier to still be going on together.

What have you been grateful for lately?

#WeekendCoffeeShare (September 10, 2022)

Posted on by Astrid

Hi everyone. I’m joining #WeekendCoffeeShare today. I just had my afternoon coffee, but I’m pretty sure there’s still some left for you. Let’s have a cup of coffee and let’s chat.

If we were having coffee, I would start out by sharing I had quite an active week again. Today, I went for a 5.8km ride on the side-by-side bike again. We rode it faster than last time: 13.4km/hour. Still slowly judging by what I know is a normal bike riding speed, but then again a side-by-side bike is probably harder to ride.

If we were having coffee, I would share that I also finally gained some of my crafty mojo back. That is, I only did one polymer clay thing, but it worked out okay. I created a cat’s head charm. It still needs to go into the oven, so I can’t show you all yet.

If we were having coffee, I would tell you today is my oldest niece Janneke’s third birthday. I sent her a coloring book, some paint and a kids’ umbrella. I may try to video call my sister later to sing “Happy Birthday” to her too. In fact, I think I’m going to text my sister now to ask when she’s got time.

If we were having coffee, lastly I’d complain about the fact that Apple won’t release an iPhone 14 Mini. Then again, this makes the decision about what phone to buy once my current iPhone battery dies rather easy. After all, I wasn’t completely convinced I wanted the 14 Mini even if Apple were going to release it, but now I’m certain I’m going for the SE 2022. Not that that one appeals to me that much, but well, I’ve got to have something and I don’t want a regular 14. Not because of what the so-called experts say (they claim it’s not worth your money but I haven’t read the articles explaining why), but because it’s too large for my liking.

I do really hope iOS 16 is going to be relatively bug-free from the start though, as some of its new features sound cool. Not just that, but I badly want WatchOS 9 and you need iOS 16 for that. I’ll wait for one particular member of the VoiceOver forum to voice his opinion though. He’s claimed each year except the year iOS 12 got released that the new big iOS update was the worst one ever and usually he’s been right at least that updating right away isn’t wise.

How have you been?

A Rather Frustrating Monday

Posted on by Astrid

It’s past 10:30PM and I’m still wide awake. I just took a PRN quetiapine. My Apple Watch and the staff’s blood pressure cuff are telling me I should be super relaxed, in that my heartrate is 67 even when sitting upright. That’s rather low for me, but not worryingly low or so the staff say. Oh yes, I know normal resting heartrate is between 60 and 100, but mine is usually closer to 100. Oh well.

Today was quite intense, honestly. In the morning, the manager came by to talk to me about my meeting with the behavior specialist last week. She also, of course, told me a new staff would be starting his orienting shifts here and he’d start right this evening. Of course, like all new staff who’ve been hired over the past six months, the first part of the home he’s being introduced to is mine. Can you read my sarcasm? Well, it should be there. I’m rather annoyed at the fact that every new staff starts working on my side of the home rather than the other one. I know it’s probably because one of the clients on the other side gets really irritable when introduced to new staff. Well, maybe I need to show a little more of my irritable side.

Then, the temping agency housekeeper came to clean my room. She left my bathroom in a horribly wet state and left the tap on its hottest setting. Thankfully, that setting is not hot enough to actually cause burns, but it did hurt a little when I tried to wash my hands.

Once my day activities started, I went for a walk. My cardio fitness level was once again low, but it hardly bothers me anymore.

In the afternoon, my staff and I drove into town so I could buy a new pair of shorts for when I go on the elliptical or ride the side-by-side bike. The old pair pretty much falls off my butt. I also bought socks and some presents for my oldest niece, who will be three on Saturday.

In the evening, I went for a short walk with the new student staff, taking his camera and tripod with us to snap some pictures. I cannot yet show them, as I haven’t yet figured out which ones show what.

Then, I wanted to go on the side-by-side bike again, but got really frustrated trying to fasten the belts around my feet. They need to be really tight or my feet, particularly my spastic left foot, will fall off the pedals. That didn’t work out and I got really overloaded, so had a short meltdown.

Later in the evening, when I was alone, I started fretting about my health. That probably caused me to feel spacey. Now that I’ve processed all this in this post, I feel slightly better. It might be the quetiapine is working as well.