#WeekendCoffeeShare (August 14, 2026)

Posted on by Astrid

Hi everyone on this blazing hot Friday. I’m joining #WeekendCoffeeShare again. It’s 7:30PM as I start typing this post, so I’ve had my last cup of coffee for the day and will likely be off for a bit before publishing this post to have my evening soft drink and chips. Let’s have a drink and let’s catch up.

If we were having coffee, first I’d talk about the weather. Oh, I already disclosed that it’s blazing hot again. We’re on our fifth local heatwave this summer if I’m correct. Today, the daytime high was 36°C. Tomorrow we’re going to have a daytime high of “only” 27°C but it’s going to get humid. I always said summer is my favorite season, but now I’m pretty sure it’s not.

If we were having coffee, I’d tell you that I’m still meeting my movement goal on my Apple Watch each day this month so far despite the heat. One reason though is the fact that, yesterday, I rode the side-by-side bike to the next town despite it being at least 30°C. That, honestly, was a stupid decision.

If we were having coffee, then I’d share that I did quite a lot of culinary activities this past week. I finally made iced tea on Monday after having bought loose-leaf green tea on Sunday. I also made a smoothie yesterday and made a tuna salad on Wednesday. No picture, because when it was on my plate, I’d just had an argument with my best friend over my choice to eat dead animals again and this caused me to feel so bad that I didn’t feel like taking a picture. The reason she was upset, by the way, wasn’t necessarily the fact that I eat meat (though that’s a valid reason for her, being a vegan, too), but the fact that I’d told her a few months ago that I would be trying to go vegan when creating my own meals and she felt that I’d lied about my intentions. I hadn’t, but my method of “trying” felt insincere to her. Thankfully, we resolved the argument eventually.

Today, I did create a vegan dessert. I used mango, silken tofu and agave syrup. The staff who helped me make it, didn’t like the strong soy tang,, but I surprisingly didn’t mind. I didn’t particularly like the texture though, which is one more reason I really need to get a food processor.

Mango mousse

If we were having coffee, I’d share that there isn’t any news on the moving front and my Care and Force Act plans probably won’t be fully ready for a couple of weeks at least. After all, both my assigned staff and support coordinator are off until late August and the behavior specialist will be off right after them.

Speaking of which, somehow the orienting of a new staff got messed up yet again this week. My support coordinator had initially said that this staff would be oriented to the activities and ADLs and then we’d evaluate to see if she needed more orienting. A few weeks ago, she told me that the orienting to the activities would be postponed but there wouldn’t be an evaluation after her orientation to my ADLs. This reeks of the one chance policy and I’m horribly upset about it. On top of that, at the last moment the person doing the orienting got switched. Yes, again! I wouldn’t even have found out if I hadn’t inquired about it myself this afternoon. It went kind of okay, but this whole thing still frustrates me to no end.

Now the new staff is an experienced worker, but I have had similar problems with student staff. In late August, a new student staff will start working here and, though my support coordinator thinks she shouldn’t be oriented to me at first, some staff disagree. Besides, if she doesn’t get oriented to me during her introductory time here and the powers-that-be decide later on that she needs to work with me anyway, will we have the same issue we had with the last student as well as with the currently orienting staff, ie. that she isn’t working as an extra anymore? I have absolutely no trust in this entire process.

I’ll sign off now, because I sense that if I continue this will end up being a negative rant again. I’m going to have a cup of green tea now.

#WeekendCoffeeShare (August 8, 2026)

Posted on by Astrid

Hi everyone. I’m joining #WeekendCoffeeShare again. I initially wanted to write this post yesterday, but got distracted by a lot of other things. As I start typing this, it’s nearly 8:30PM, so I’ve had all of my drinks except for maybe soon a cup of tea. Feel free to grab a cup of your favorite beverage though and let’s chat.

If we were having coffee, first I’d talk about the weather. It’s been hot for most of the week, but thankfully not blazing hot. My best friend says the weather trend is for temps to go down, but when I look at my iPhone’s Weather app, temps above 30°C are in the forecast again for next week. Night-time temps are lowering, thankfully. In fact, last night the temperature dropped to single digits. Unfortunately, it’s still too warm for my liking in my room at night.

If we were having coffee, next I’d tell you that due to the warm weather as well as overthinking, I haven’t been sleeping all that well lately. At least half of the nights this past week, I didn’t sleep until 3AM or later. Thankfully, last night I slept okay.

If we were having coffee, then I’d tell you I did thankfully still meet my movement goal on my Apple Watch each day. Well, except for today so far, but I still have time. I find that biking feels less bothersome in hot weather than walking, probably because I ride an eBike. Our home’s side-by-side bike has been waiting to get fixed forever, but thankfully the nearby day center allowed us to borrow its bike. On that one, I rode to the next town twice.

Once, I bought some supplies for making iced tea. I bought a large tea container and an ice cube tray. The staff bought jugs. I also finally bought a water bottle, because I want to hydrate more. I don’t have loose-leaf tea yet, so no iced tea has been made so far.

If we were having coffee, then I’d share that I did engage in a few culinary activities this week. Like I shared on Wednesday, I made a cabbage and potato dish for my side of the home.

Today, I made a no-bake cheesecake. I’d always somehow believed that no-bake is easier than baking, but it’s not. I spent over an hour trying to make the bottom, then struggled with the filling layer too. I in part blame the recipe, which wasn’t nearly detailed enough for my needs and said we needed to make the bottom in a blender. I have been saying I want to buy a food processor for months but never got down to it. Now I honestly wish I’d had one. In the end, we made the dough using a stick mixer. The cheesecake turned out quite good after all, but I certainly will get myself a food processor soon.

Cheesecake
Another photo of the cheesecake
Slice of cheesecake

If we were having coffee, I’d tell you I finally saw the results of my bloodwork on Monday. I’d had my annual blood test several weeks prior and have had access to my medical records for a few weeks too but somehow the GP hadn’t given me access to this part of the records. Everything was within the normal range except for a measure of kidney function that’s always low for me. My egfr was 67 this time. I in part blame the hot weather and my lack of proper hydration, so that’s why I have been wanting to hydrate more. I say this each summer, but hopefully with the water bottle I’ll finally get it done. My blood glucose, cholesterol and triglycerides were all excellent.

If we were having coffee, finally I’d share that, on Monday, I’ll have a meeting on my Care and Force Act plan, which details the circumstances under which I can be restrained, this home being locked, etc. I could write a novel on all the things I don’t like about the plan. I won’t now, because I want to end on a semi-positive note. Please wish me luck on the meeting.

Oh wait, if we were having coffee I’d share that I finally figured out a way to display my images in a gallery while still accessible with my screen reader. Please share any (gentle) feedback with me on how this looks visually.

#WeekendCoffeeShare (July 4, 2026)

Posted on by Astrid

Hi everyone. I’m joining #WeekendCoffeeShare again. It’s nearly 10PM as I start typing this post and I’ll soon need to brush my teeth, but I’ll finish this post before going off to bed. I just had my cup of green tea. If you’d like something to drink either hot or cold, feel free to and let’s chat.

If we were having coffee, first I’d talk about the weather. The heatwave has thankfully ended and we now usually have daytime highs of about 24°C, sometimes even cooler. It’s been quite windy and occasionally rainy too, so I’ve actually even been wearing my jeans again.

If we were having coffee, then I’d tell you that, obviously, I didn’t meet my June monthly challenge goal on my Apple Watch and I didn’t get the perfect month award. So far in July, I’m still meeting my movement goal each day, but I’m not expecting to make it to a perfect month this time either.

I did ride the side-by-side bike to the next town’s market again yesterday. It had been months since I visited the market, but the guy behind the olive stall did recognize me.

If we were having coffee, then I’d tell you all that I celebrated my birthday at the care home on Wednesday. It was a bit difficult. I’d had big plans for baking two cheesecakes and making a pasta bake for the entire home (20 residents). The cheesecakes were a success, but during the pasta bake preparation process, there were some bumps in the road. However, in the end both were delicious! Yes, even the fellow resident who always complains about food being too spicy, loved my pasta arrabbiata bake. I’d made it once before but had then deseeded the peppers. Not this time.

Caramel cheesecake
Pasta bake

If we were having coffee, I’d tell you that I’ve also been quite crafty recently, particularly early in the week. I crafted two small butterflies out of polymer clay (using a mold), to be turned into earrings later. When my one-on-one for the moment saw my other molds, she wanted to use a bigger butterfly mold that I hadn’t used in years. She proposed to use multiple colors in a marbling technique and chose eight all very different colors, including both yellow and purple. I know a little about color theory and said yellow mixed with purple becomes a horrible brownish color. My staff said that, if the butterfly turned brownish, she’d take it home and display it on her fridge. I ended up giving it to her regardless, but it didn’t turn ugly! I do take the credit for being careful not to overmix the colors, though in hindsight I might’ve undermixed them for the effect she wanted.

Polymer clay butterfly

If we were having coffee, I’d share that this crafty endeavor made me decide to order several other small earring molds. My sister had gifted me a voucher for one of my favorite clay supplies shops and I spent it on molds, cutters and also two new colors of acrylic paint. One of the paints was named sorbet and I had absolutely no idea what color that’s supposed to be. I now realize I could’ve had AI describe the image on the website, but I ordered the color and only discovered that it’s a kind of pink once it arrived.

If we were having coffee, I’d finally share that specialized client support contacted the behavior specialist and they’re now going to get back to me. When I found out they wanted to talk to the behavior specialist, I feared my care agency was going to hijack the entire process. I’m still not convinced that they aren’t, particularly since finding out yesterday that the team leader had informed the staff that I’m leaving before I’d even gotten a clear idea of the consequences of the meeting with the substitute behavior specialist in which she’d posed the question whether I’m in the right place here. It doesn’t help that staff are making all kinds of assumptions about what kind of place would be better suited to me and what I find most important. The truth is, my main requirement is that a future placement’s team, including higher-ups, truly wants to understand and accommodate my needs. I don’t want to have to move again in two or three years.

Every Move Counts!

Posted on by Astrid
Daily writing prompt
Hit 5,000 steps today and drop your achievement here — we’re cheering you on!
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I have had an Apple Watch for nearly four years. Its movement goals are based on calories burned while being physically active rather than steps. It doesn’t even automatically display your step count. I just checked the Health app on my iPhone and my step count on there is nearly 7,000 at 7:30PM.

Because I get most of my physical exercise through walking, I can safely assume that a day’s step count at least correlates to my level of physical activity for the day. That is, unless I rode the side-by-side bike to the next town or even farther.

My calorie goal on my Apple Watch is 300. This goal is fairly easy to reach if I go for at least one walk. Even if I don’t walk, I can still reach it by dancing for about 20 minutes. The only times I didn’t reach my movement goal, were times when I wasn’t physically active at all, like during last week’s heatwave.

That being said, level of physical activity alone doesn’t determine health benefits. Effort does too. People who use a wheelchair full-time can still experience some health benefits of physical activity when they challenge themselves beyond their comfort zone. At least, this applies to brain health benefits. For metabolic health, actual movement is required. But not necessarily steps.

I honestly believe that I, even though I regularly hit those elusive 10K steps, experience fewer health benefits from my physical exercise than many who get in fewer steps. I mean, like I said, most of my physical activity involves walking. I should really incorporate more varied exercise into my routine. I do try to challenge myself physically even though this is in ways non-disabled people wouldn’t consider challenging. This way, I hope to keep my mind as sharp as possible.

#WeekendCoffeeShare (May 23, 2026)

Posted on by Astrid

Hi everyone. I’m joining #WeekendCoffeeShare again. I originally started typing this post yesterday evening but got distracted and distressed and then never finished my post. It’s now nearly 9PM on Saturday. I just had my evening soft drink but since it’s blazing hot out here, I’ll have to make sure to drink plenty of water. Let’s have a drink and let’s catch up.

If we were having coffee, first I’d expand on my comment about it being blazing hot and talk about the weather. Early in the week, the daytime temp barely got above 12°C and we had rain. On Wednesday, the daytime temperature started to rise and today it’s 30°C. I honestly don’t mind as much, although of course it still being May this makes me worried for the real summer.

If we were having coffee, then I’d share that I am still in the game for a perfect month with respect to my movement ring on my Apple Watch. April was a hard month and I didn’t meet my goal several days. This month, I’m probably not going to meet my monthly challenge goal, but at least I still have a chance at closing my movement ring each day.

Yesterday, the staff and I originally planned on riding the side-by-side bike to the nearby lake for a cup of coffee (and my favorite caramel pie). Unfortunately, the bike wouldn’t work properly so we went for a walk instead and stopped by the institution townhouse for a coffee. They sometimes offer cake too, but apparently not this time.

If we were having coffee, I’d share that I made use of both my culinary activity time slots this week. Today, I baked a banana cake. The bananas should’ve been riper, but it was okay nonetheless.

On Wednesday, I cooked a one-pot pasta dish with broccoli, chicken and pesto sauce. I’ve given up my idea of cooking vegan dinners only, because all the prep is just too hard.

Besides, the behavior specialist noticed how happy cooking for my fellow residents made me and talked to my support coordinator about it. Soon, I’ll likely have a weekly opportunity to cook for my side of the home. Whether this will be full-on dinner prep each week, will have to be decided on.

If we were having coffee, next I’d share that the behavior specialist came by on Thursday for a talk. It’s a shame she’s a substitute, because it looks like she’s much more understanding of my situation than the regular one. I do hope that she’ll be able to talk some sense into the regular one when she comes back in a month or so though.

It isn’t like she wasn’t critical of me, of course. For example, she asked me whether there’s any risk in my writing about my life in the institution openly online for this care agency. I was up front with her that I can be quite harsh in my criticism of my staff and, if they read it, they may recognize themselves. However, I never name my institution or any individual workers. Not that, being that I’m not an employee, there’s any law prohibiting me from naming and shaming the institution if I so wished, but I can see it wouldn’t help my relationship with my staff. That’s why I don’t usually give out my blog address to staff.

One of the positive outcomes of our meeting is the fact that the behavior specialist and I got talking about my IQ. As regular readers of this blog know, the IQ that’s in my care plan was pulled out of mid-air, in that no-one except for me knows where it came from and until now, no-one seemed to care. It turns out she’d been looking for the report and couldn’t find it. Phew, finally! I explained that the report is nowhere to be found except on my personal computer. The report literally dates back to 1999 and isn’t the best childhood psych eval report I have at that. But it’s the one with the catchiest punchline, ie. the three-digit IQ score. I never realized myself until very recently that most staff, being practically educated, go right for catchy bullet points and, as a result, won’t remember the pages and pages of information about my emotional development when they’ve been wowed about my “super high” IQ. In any case, here’s hoping the behavior specialist will finally get this nonsensical number removed from my care plan.

If we were having coffee, I’d then ramble on non-stop about the other issues this meeting brought up. Do you have a couple hours? I just deleted an incredibly long paragraph because I saw my post was fast approaching 1000 words. Instead, I’ll wrap this up and go to bed, as it’s nearly 11:30PM by now.

#WeekendCoffeeShare (March 6, 2026)

Posted on by Astrid

Hi everyone. I’m joining #WeekendCoffeeShare again. It’s 7:30PM as I start typing this, so I’ve had my last cup of coffee for the day and will take a break from writing this post at around 8PM to have my evening fizzy drink. Actually, Dubbelfrisss, which I generally have, isn’t very fizzy, being that it is only slightly carbonated. That’s a good thing, since I can’t stand actual fizzy drinks. Anyway, let’s have a drink and let’s catch up.

If we were having coffee, first I’d talk about the weather. It’s been incredibly warm all week with daytime highs above 15°C each day. Today we even had a daytime high of 18°C. It’s been sunny for most of the week too. I know, climate change and all and we’re probably getting summertime temps above 30°C, but for now I love this weather.

If we were having coffee, I’d also proudly announce that I broke my exercise record on my Apple Watch again. Yesterday, I got in 190 exercise minutes, both by walking and by biking to Deventer.

If we were having coffee, I’d tell you that I rode the side-by-side bike to Deventer twice this week, both times looking for new clothes. On Tuesday, I bought a few jeans and a blouse. Yesterday, I initially wanted to buy a blouse and a shirt, but didn’t end up buying those when I found out they were rather light-colored. So is one of the jeans I bought on Tuesday, so now I’m afraid I’ve stained it beyond cleaning already. This once happened with a pair of off white pants I bought with a staff several years ago and my wife said wise staff won’t let me wear light-colored clothes because of the risk of me spilling coffee over them. I told the staff I went clothes shopping this yesterday and she said I could put a napkin on my lap to prevent this. The thing is, I only need to forget this once for clothes to be ruined by coffee stains. I’m now unsure as to whether I was wise even having gone clothes shopping with her.

If we were having coffee, I’d tell you I’ve been playing around with AI a bit. Last Saturday, when I shared the Warmies unicorn soft toy on here, I tried to take several more pictures, but none were better than the one I’d posted. Then I decided to ask CoPilot to edit the image to make the unicorn stand out more. I don’t know whether the original picture was recognizable as a unicorn, but I loved how CoPilot recreated it.

For reference, here’s the original photo I took.

If we were having coffee, lastly I’d share that I finally saw my new, activity-based day schedule, to be taking effect on April 1. To be honest, it’s a bit disappointing, in that my assigned staff just added the activities I’d proposed to it and that’s it. How this could take months of “thinking” to take effect, I don’t know. On top of that, the new schedule will take effect on the same day the home will start having a new staffing schedule too. My support coordinator told me there’s no shortening of hours, but at an important time for me, there is. You see, when I proposed my activity-based day schedule, I’d added my daily cup of tea at around 9PM into it, both to make the schedule more aligned with reality and because that cup of tea truly helps me make it through the night without support. Unfortunately, it’s not in my new day schedule and staffing will be cut at 9PM too. I for clarity’s sake don’t need one-on-one attention then, but it does help when staff keep an eye on me. My support coordinator, who told me about the staffing changes and new day schedule, said I can’t expect everyone else to be in bed by 8:30PM because I want my cup of tea and there’s not enough staff to keep in touch with me and help the others to bed at the same time. No, I can’t, but it’s not me who cut those hours. Several staff have told me I’ll have to wait and see how things go and no-one is prohibiting me from having a cup of tea, but then why can’t it be in my day schedule?

#WeekendCoffeeShare (February 27, 2026)

Posted on by Astrid

Hi everyone. I’m joining #WeekendCoffeeShare today. It’s just past 5:30PM as I start typing this blog post, so I’ll still have my evening coffee at 7PM. If you’d like to grab a drink too, feel free to get yourself a cup or glass of your favorite beverage and let’s chat.

If we were having coffee, first I’d talk about the weather. It’s been crazy! Crazy good in my opinion, in that yesterday and on Wednesday, the daytime temp climbed to 17°C. Today we had a daytime high of 15°C and more wind. It’s raining now too, which I’m told is necessary, as the winter has been horribly dry over here.

If we were having coffee, then I’d tell you that I reached my movement goal on my Apple Watch each day this week. Yesterday and on Wednesday, I even doubled it. I also broke my exercise minutes record yesterday. I mostly went for walks, but on Tuesday, I also rode the side-by-side bike to Deventer to get some shopping done. City representatives were having a survey about the bike-friendliness of the city. I accepted the flyer because the person handing it out was making a fuss of how special the side-by-side bike is. And also, we got a free serving of “poffertjes”. Note to self: actually do that survey!

On Wednesday I also rode the side-by-side bike to the nearby lakeshore to have a cup of coffee and a piece of caramel pie. No pictures this time, but it’s the same caramel pie I had a few times last year too. I must say, this place is pretty budget-friendly, in that I only paid €6.95.

If we were having coffee, I’d provide an update on my medical situation. I had bloodwork done on Monday because of increasing IBS symptoms. Thankfully, nothing came out of it. I’m okay just dealing with the pain and discomfort, knowing that at least it’s not something more serious.

This is not necessarily the case with respect to my involuntary movements and tremors. Like I shared on Saturday, my doctor says they’ll only get worse because I’m getting older. I call bullshit to that, in that, while literally everyone gets older, it’s not like I’m elderly at 39. My wife looked up tardive dyskinesia (TD) as a result of medications, which my doctor didn’t mention specifically but then again she never mentions anything specifically. If I have this, there’s some medication for it in the works, but it isn’t available in Europe yet.

My wife at one point mentioned that this medication is prescribed to people with Huntington’s Disease too. I know there are similarities between tardive dyskinesia and Huntington’s, but I didn’t know how far these go. I finally joined a TD group on Facebook and asked. Thankfully, TD is not a death sentence and it may not even progress. That doesn’t mean I’m no longer distressed, because, quite frankly, unlike my IBS symptoms, the involuntary movements significantly impair me.

If we were having coffee, I’d tell you I decreased my antipsychotic again starting today. I’m now on 9mg of aripiprazole. I’d expected to get one 5mg tablet and four 1mg tablets, but for some stupid reason I got nine 1mg tablets. This means I can now just about barely swallow all of my pills at once.

If we were having coffee, finally I’d share that the talk with my support coordinator on Sunday was a bit disappointing. There are several things about my care that frustrate me and she told me it’ll take months before there’ll be any significant changes. Thankfully, she didn’t mean my day schedule. That might change a little sooner. She also scheduled a meeting with the behavior specialist who’s now responsible for my home now that the regular one is on maternity leave. That meeting will be on March 10.

#WeekendCoffeeShare (January 17, 2026)

Posted on by Astrid

Hi everyone. I’m joining #WeekendCoffeeShare again today. It’s nearly 7:45PM, so I’ve had my last cup of coffee for the day and am soon going to step away from the computer to have a soft drink and chips. Grab a cup of your favorite beverage and let’s chat.

If we were having coffee, first I’d talk about the weather. Last Sunday, it was freezing still with nighttime temps as low as -9°C. Yesterday and today, the daytime high was 10°C. Mother Nature is having mood swings.

If we were having coffee, next I’d share that, this week, I’ll probably have a perfect week with respect to my Apple Watch activity rings. I’m not all that ambitious about it, honestly, but it’s nice to see a virtual medal. Yesterday, I did complete the New Year’s challenge, which is to close all of your rings seven days in a row sometime during January.

If we were having coffee, next I’d update you on the assigned staff/support coordinator thing. I mentioned a few weeks ago that my assigned staff is in training to become a support coordinator and after that, it’d originally been decided she’d be both my support coordinator and assigned staff, with some stupid comment about me being able to come to anyone with my concerns. That was rather frustrating for me, as then everyone would be making decisions about me and my support would be even more chaotic than it already is. Well, yesterday I was told that my current support coordinator will remain my support coordinator for now and my assigned staff will remain my assigned staff.

I did have an argument about this with another staff today. There’s been made a decision about my showering routine which she disagrees with and she’d been telling me how she felt about it. I told her to stop coming to me for changes to my support agreement, instead going to either my support coordinator or assigned staff. She then claimed that she would no longer be doing fun activities with me, as that’s an assigned staff’s job too. That’s not true and it felt like she was using black-and-white logic. Unfortunately, this particular staff isn’t very able to accept criticism.

If we were having coffee, then I’d tell you I did enjoy some fun activities over the week. On Thursday, I went to have lunch at the institution townhouse with a staff. I chose a poke bowl.

Yesterday, I rode the side-by-side bike to the market in the next town. I bought olives, feta-filled green peppers (which it turned out I like despite thinking I don’t like feta), arugula and spinach and tried to buy fried chicken, but it was almost sold out. The vendor gave me what he had left over for free.

If we were having coffee, I’d share that my wife and I are pretty certain we’ll get a divorce after all. On Tuesday, she and I will be meeting up with a financial advisor to discuss the financial consequences of getting a divorce. I’ll still need to do some official ID stuff before that, but my wife is going to help me with this when she’s here tomorrow.

If we were having coffee, finally I’d share that I bought new earbuds. Yes, again. I bought JBL earbuds, because, though I have AirPods and JBL headphones, I prefer earbuds to headphones and yet the AirPods don’t work well with non-Apple products. I’m not yet entirely sure I like the new earbuds, but they weren’t horribly expensive.

#WeekendCoffeeShare (December 6, 2025)

Posted on by Astrid

Hi everyone. Yesterday, I had tons of ideas on my mind on what to blog about but no motivation to actually write. Today, it’s the opposite. I’m joining in with #WeekendCoffeeShare even though I think I don’t have a lot to share today. I, as usual, had my last cup of coffee for the day about half an hour ago and am going to take a break from writing this post to have my soft drink and chips. Let’s have a drink and let’s catch up.

If we were having coffee, first I’d talk about the weather. For most of the week, it was chilly but not rainy with daytime temps around 7°C. Today, the daytime high was 10°C but it’s been raining all day.

If we were having coffee, I’d tell you that I was pretty active for most of the week, both by walking and one time by cycling to the next town just to have a purpose for cycling. I didn’t need any groceries and we only ended up having a snack, but at least we weren’t aimlessly cycling around.

Today though, I spent the entire day indoors and still need to dance or whatever to reach my movement goal on my Apple Watch. My streak for whatever reason is still stuck on 33 days even though I’m moving each day and it’s been stuck on 33 days for a month or so.

If we were having coffee, then I’d tell you that I had many plans over the past week but haven’t accomplished a lot. On Monday and Tuesday, I did create some Christmas decorations out of polymer clay. Yesterday, I attempted to bake cookies. They turned out okay but not great and the process was frustrating. Nonetheless, it was better than lying in bed or staring into space, which is what I’ve been doing a lot lately.

If we were having coffee, I’d cheat a little with the coffee share being about the past week, since there was none last week. I’d share about the meeting I had with the behavior specialist early last week. It went well. First of all, like I said, the “one chance” rule about orienting new staff got ditched. My assigned staff, who is in training to become my side of the home’s support coordinator now too, E-mailed me the new orienting plan yesterday and it looks pretty good.

We also discussed my day schedule. In the future, I’ll hopefully get more set activities. In preparation for this, my assigned staff created instruction cards for some of my activities, so that I can hopefully do more activities regardless of which staff is assigned to me. She E-mailed these to me too and I gave some feedback.

If we were having coffee, lastly I’d share that I’ve been having lots of memories lately. And by “memories” I don’t mean good ones. Yesterday, for example, I remembered the team meeting for my current home I attended in the summer of 2023. One of the staff, when I told them that I can’t prepare my own lunch, replied: “But you lived independently, right?”. I immediately got defensive, because yes, I technically lived independently, but I shouldn’t have. Yesterday when I was talking about this with my wife, whom I’d first met when living on my own in 2007, she told me more about how bad it actually was. Until a few years ago, I believed that, while I couldn’t cope, this was mostly a mental thing. In other words, I was falling apart mentally but could really care for myself if I hadn’t been so scared. Well, no.

It is sad to realize that part of the reason why I need so much care is lack of training in childhood, adolescence and to a lesser degree early adulthood. I’m still struggling with my parents’ reasoning that they couldn’t have taught me because I was too strong-willed and just didn’t want to learn. It may’ve been true that I didn’t understand why I had to learn something that caused me frustration, but then isn’t it the parents’ job to guide the child through their frustration? I’m honestly still struggling with this.

How I’m Feeling (Or Something Like It)

Posted on by Astrid
Daily writing prompt
How are you feeling right now?
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I’m not sure how I feel right now. It’s past 11PM and I badly want to write, but don’t have the slightest idea what about. That’s probably why I’m turning to the WordPress Daily Prompt, which is quite generic today if you ask me. Or is it? Maybe it’s just that I, being quite intellectually-focused, don’t know how to answer this.

Wait, I was an Enneagram type 4, right? I guess not. I’m perpetually confused as to whether I’m a 4w5 or 5w4. Maybe that means I’m some other type entirely. Or the Enneagram is just pseudoscience (which I know it is but feel in my heart that it’s not).

But I digress. I’ve been feeling all sorts of things today. In the afternoon, I rode the side-by-side bike to the next town to buy some groceries. I also bought a hand mixer and a baking tray, because next week I’m going to bake Biscoff blondies. This was a fun activity, so I felt good. Retail therapy, I guess.

In the evening, I felt overloaded because my spouse was telling me a story on the phone at the same time that a staff entered my room. This had me feeling stressed out for an hour or so.

Then I felt excited again, as I was going to craft a special coffee for my fellow residents and staff. It’s special because it had hazelnut-flavored coffee syrup in it and foaming milk on top. I’m no barista or even close, but I liked the activity. One of my fellow residents, the last time she got my special coffee, was over the moon about the “liquor” in it.

Now it’s 11:30PM and I’m probably supposed to be in bed, but I don’t really feel tired. I think I’m just going to read some more blogs and then go to bed.