Gratitude List (December 3, 2022) #TToT

Hi everyone. I did a complaint post yesterday and honestly am still feeling like crap, but wallowing in it isn’t going to help. Instead, for this reason, I’m going to write a gratitude list. As usual, I’m joining Ten Things of Thankful (#TToT). Here goes.

1. I am grateful for my husband. He sticks by me through the hard place that is this new care home.

2. I am grateful for my mother-in-law. She tries to stand up for me to the powers-that-be too.

3. I am grateful for my old day activities staff. They visited me on Thursday and we had an extensive lunch together.

4. I am grateful for an opportunity to create another polymer clay flower. And a strawberry. Unfortunately, that having made that morning a relative success, was used by my staff as an opportunity to silence my mother-in-law’s attempt at speaking to the higher-ups.

5. I am grateful for the support of my online friends.

6. I am grateful that my most recent major self-harm episode, early Wednesday, didn’t cause any lasting damage.

7. I am grateful for quetiapine (Seroquel), my PRN medication. It hadn’t been refilled when I had run out of it a while ago, so I was without it when I badly needed it a few times this week. This was one of the reasons I had my major self-harm episode. However, I am so thankful it got refilled.

8. I am grateful for an electric heater. Since my heating broke down, my husband eventually called the care home to tell my staff they had to provide me a way to stay warm until my heating got fixed and they thankfully listened. Unfortunately, it seems the thing broke down as I was typing this post.

9. I am grateful the repair crew came out to fix my heating earlier this evening. Because of the type of heating, it may take up to 24 hours before my room will be comfortably warm though.

10. I am grateful for distractions in the form of books and podcasts and blogs. I may want to dive into the disability activist blogosphere once again, assuming such a thing still exists.

What are you thankful for?

TGIF: Walking and Crafting

Hi everyone on this third Friday of November. I’m joining Paula Light for TGIF. How is your day going? Mine’s almost over, as it is 9PM as I type this.

I had a pretty good day. Have had an okay week in general anyway. Finally got down to creating my first actual polymer clay piece here at the new care home, a flower. Creating this simple piece took me about 45 minutes yesterday, including gathering my supplies, watching the tutorial, conditioning the clay, etc. The piece nearly got ruined when the staff took it off the tile to transfer it to an oven-safe mat, but thankfully she was able to put it back together. I initially didn’t want to cure the clay because, once cured, if a piece is ugly beyond sanding/buffing, all you can do is throw it in the trash. However, after some thought, I decided I wanted something tangible to remember my first actual claying session in the new care home by.

As those who’ve seen my creations from back at the old care home, will know, this one can’t compare to those. However, I feel judging from the fact that I haven’t been actually working with clay in a long while, I did an okay job.

I also went on several walks this past week. Haven’t met my step goal, insofar as I have one – those who know the Apple Watch, know its movement goal is calorie-based, not step-based -, but I have been doing an okay job overall. My movement goal, by the way, is easy to reach. My exercise goal, not so much. My monthly goal for November on the Apple Watch is to reach my daily exercise goal 23 out of 30 days. I reached my monthly goals for September and October – different goals – with ease, but am struggling with this one, because walking and dancing are my only ways of exercising here now that I don’t have my elliptical anymore. I could cheat by starting some ball game workout when throwing a ball with my staff, but that’s not fair.

Overall, this week is going okay with respect to my care. A slightly modified version of the day schedule I mentioned last Saturday got shoved down my throat once again on Tuesday, but thankfully, most staff are willing to take it with a grain of salt (or a whole bucket of salt).

Unfortunately, the situation had to get worse over the weekend before it got slightly better and the slightly better (ie. an okay week this week) might just be chance. I won’t disclose details of the, in my opinion, unacceptable care I received over the weekend.

I talked to an independent mediator about my care situation today (this is not a secret, all staff know I did). I won’t disclose what exactly we discussed, but we’re hoping to resolve the difficult care situation as peacefully as possible.

Here’s hoping you’ll all have a good weekend.

Gratitude List (October 22, 2022) #TToT

Hi everyone. I’m feeling very overloaded today, but it’s too early for me to go to bed or I might wake up in the middle of the night and not be able to go back to sleep. Instead, I’m writing a gratitude post. As always, I’m joining Ten Things of Thankful (#TToT). Here goes.

1. I am grateful I was able to let go of the issue with the staff from two weeks ago.

2. I am grateful for delicious home-cooked couscous, which a staff member who is originally from Morocco shared with me and a few others at the care home on Sunday.

3. I am grateful I beat this same staff member 4-0 in the card game mau-mau again today, but also grateful he beat me on Thursday. I think I told you all last week that he’s learning the game from me, so I love it when he wins (but I love it just a bit more when I win!).

4. I am grateful I was able to try out polymer clay a few times this week. So far, all of my projects failed before I even attempted to bake them, but that’s okay.

5. I am grateful for white chocolate. I consumed quite a bit of it over this week.

6. I am grateful my medication got sorted. It was quite the ordeal last Saturday and I actually called the out-of-hours GP surgery, not knowing that, if my staff said I could cope without meds for a day or possibly two, that meant a doctor had actually said so already. In the end, I got my Saturday morning meds at around 9PM and am now thankfully fully in the electronic medication system.

7. I am grateful for quetiapine. I just took one about half an hour ago and thankfully, it’s calming me.

8. I am grateful for fish. Doubly grateful, in fact. Last Saturday, my staff took me to the marketplace for fish and, this afternoon, the staff ordered fish for everyone at a fish shop in the next town.

9. I am grateful for warm weather. The daytime temperature hardly got below 15°C this past week and, for the past several days, it’s been 18°C.

10. I am grateful for a nice, long walk across institution grounds and through the nearby forest with a fellow resident ant two staff. I regret not having taken my phone with me so that I could have taken pictures.

What are you grateful for?

Gratitude List (October 14, 2022) #TToT

Hi everyone. I’m still struggling a little, but this means it’s all the more important I look at the positives of my life. For this reason, I’m joining in with Ten Things of Thankful for a gratitude list. Here goes.

1. I am grateful my support coordinator is back in the home today after several weeks of being either off work or busy with out-of-the-home duties.

2. I am grateful the staff whom I had a huge issue with last week – the details of which I won’t disclose on the blog -, hasn’t been working here since.

3. I am grateful my support coordinator offered to sit with me and said staff to talk things over so that I can let them go. We aren’t yet sure when this can take place.

4. I am grateful I found out an oven/microwave combo works for polymer clay after all, provided you set it to its oven setting. This means I will most likely be able to use my home’s oven for polymer clay.

5. I am grateful for a nice visit from my mother-in-law on Tuesday. I am also grateful I was able to walk for an hour during said visit.

6. I am grateful for green tea without any additional flavors. That’s my favorite tea, or maybe really it’s the only tea I’ll drink. I am grateful the staff ordered it.

7. I am grateful for relatively nice weather. It’s been raining a bit over the past few days, but not all day, so I have been able to take walks every single day this week.

8. I am grateful for some distraction in the form of a few games of mau-mau, a card game, with my one-on-one. I was even able to teach one of my staff the game and he beat me to it.

9. I am grateful I tried penne carbonara on Tuesday, since it turned out I actually sort of like it.

10. I am grateful I usually get along with all my fellow residents here at the home. Of course, we all have our issues and it’s an intensive support (ie. behavior) home for a reason, but for the most part they’re nice people.

What are you grateful for?

#WeekendCoffeeShare (September 10, 2022)

Hi everyone. I’m joining #WeekendCoffeeShare today. I just had my afternoon coffee, but I’m pretty sure there’s still some left for you. Let’s have a cup of coffee and let’s chat.

If we were having coffee, I would start out by sharing I had quite an active week again. Today, I went for a 5.8km ride on the side-by-side bike again. We rode it faster than last time: 13.4km/hour. Still slowly judging by what I know is a normal bike riding speed, but then again a side-by-side bike is probably harder to ride.

If we were having coffee, I would share that I also finally gained some of my crafty mojo back. That is, I only did one polymer clay thing, but it worked out okay. I created a cat’s head charm. It still needs to go into the oven, so I can’t show you all yet.

If we were having coffee, I would tell you today is my oldest niece Janneke’s third birthday. I sent her a coloring book, some paint and a kids’ umbrella. I may try to video call my sister later to sing “Happy Birthday” to her too. In fact, I think I’m going to text my sister now to ask when she’s got time.

If we were having coffee, lastly I’d complain about the fact that Apple won’t release an iPhone 14 Mini. Then again, this makes the decision about what phone to buy once my current iPhone battery dies rather easy. After all, I wasn’t completely convinced I wanted the 14 Mini even if Apple were going to release it, but now I’m certain I’m going for the SE 2022. Not that that one appeals to me that much, but well, I’ve got to have something and I don’t want a regular 14. Not because of what the so-called experts say (they claim it’s not worth your money but I haven’t read the articles explaining why), but because it’s too large for my liking.

I do really hope iOS 16 is going to be relatively bug-free from the start though, as some of its new features sound cool. Not just that, but I badly want WatchOS 9 and you need iOS 16 for that. I’ll wait for one particular member of the VoiceOver forum to voice his opinion though. He’s claimed each year except the year iOS 12 got released that the new big iOS update was the worst one ever and usually he’s been right at least that updating right away isn’t wise.

How have you been?

My Ideal Ways of Spending My Day

Hi everyone. I have been thinking about ways in which I would like to spend my days if I get to move to the main institution. Like I said yesterday, each client has their own day program, so they aren’t required to go to the day center by default. I also will keep my one-on-one support at least until December of 2023. In today’s post, I want to share my ideal ways of spending my days. These are things I might be able to implement should I remain here, but I’m dreaming big here and thinking of ways the institution could accommodate me too.

First, I would like to start my day in my room like I currently do. I don’t think I can handle eating breakfast in a group as of yet. That might change in the future. I would like to eat all my main meals in my room, but go to the living room for coffee breaks when I want to.

Ways I would like to spend my day, include crafting of course. I would really like to keep on doing my polymer clay work and maybe even sell it in the day center’s shop.

The day activities I am thinking the institution could help me meet my dreams with, are those related to sports and physical activity. I know the institution has a small swimming pool on grounds and I’d really like to use it. I’m not sure whether they might have exercise equipment too, like the type of equipment you’d find in a gym. If they do, I’d love to utilize that too.

The institution is in a rural estate area, so I’d love to go for walks on grounds. I’ll take my iPhone (by then, I might have a new one, who knows?) to take pictures of the beautiful nature.

I’ll hopefully at some point be able to take short walks on grounds on my own too. For that, I’ll need orientation and mobility training from the blindness agency, but I’m sure I can get that.

I may occasionally want to relax in a snoezelen® room. Then again, if I’m correct, I can keep my weighted blanket if I move within this care agency, so I might not even need a snoezelen® room.

I’ll probably also want to go to a day center every once in a while to socialize with other clients. The institution has three day centers I believe, but I’m pretty sure clients from the home I might go to won’t go to all three. That’s okay though, I’ll find out what suits me.

#WeekendCoffeeShare (August 20, 2022)

Hi everyone. I’m joining #WeekendCoffeeShare today. Even though I was late having my last cup of coffee this evening, I’m even later writing this post, so sorry, no coffee left for you. We do have soft drinks though or you can have water or maybe I can make you a cup of tea. That being said, I’d advise against black tea, since it’s at least almost my bedtime by the time I finish this post. Oh wait, this is a worldwide gathering over virtual coffee or tea or whatever we like. Let’s have a drink and let’s catch up.

If we were having coffee, I’d start out by asking how your weather is. Ours has been good all week, with temperatures rising to 30°C on Tuesday and in the mid to upper twenties (Celsius) during the rest of the week. Some days, it was too hot and especially humid for walking, but other days, it was just the right temperature.

If we were having coffee, I would tell you I’ve been busy thinking of what to create for the fellow resident who has his birthday next Thursday. After all, originally I intended on creating a canvas with polymer clay cookie cutter shapes of a car and the letters of his name on it, but the cutters for the letters won’t work with polymer clay, because the inside parts of some letters are much shallower than the outline. I thought about buying different cutters, but my husband came up with the idea of glitter stickers. They had them at Hema, a department store here, or so he thought. Not at the one we were at today, so I ended up buying regular letter stickers. Thing is, these are much smaller than I’d intended. Besides, I’m not sure stickers will stick onto painted canvas. I’m probably just making a card with those stickers and then doing the polymer clay car in some other way.

If we were having coffee, I’d share that I’m quite discouraged where it comes to my possibly moving to another care home. I had a meeting with some people from the main institution for my care agency three weeks ago, but haven’t heard from them. Other than that, I found out yesterday that the only place the care consultant applied for me at is a senior citizens’ assisted living facility that happens to cater to the blind. In a way, I can see his point, in that my funding is based on blindness and, in this sense, an intellectual disability facility like my current one has to tweak stuff in order to accept me. That assisted living facility is probably the only place within an hour’s driving distance from Lobith that accepts blindness-based funding. Then again, other than them catering to the blind, I can see absolutely no reason why the place would be suitable. And honestly, them catering to the blind may in fact be a drawback, as it means I can’t use my blindness as an “excuse” to explain complicated difficulties of mine by, hence my needing to explain myself in detail. That really has caused me extreme problems of being overloaded in the past. I mean, it would be okay if the staff knew blindness and cerebral palsy and autism and emotional developmental dysfunction and all the issues that cause me to struggle greatly in real life, but as far as I’m concerned most of these don’t affect the elderly in particular.

If we were having coffee, I’d try to end on a positive note though by telling you I had a good time with my husband today. He was originally supposed to be here by 1PM, but got stuck in traffic and couldn’t be here till 2PM. He almost turned around, because we had a misunderstanding about it, but he eventually got here and then we drove to Enkhuizen. Enkhuizen is a town about 100km from Raalte, so halfway across the country. My husband wanted to have fish, but not here in the east, which was his excuse for driving there. Then we walked around the town center, going to Hema for those stickers I mentioned above. Then we drove back to Raalte, grabbing a McDonald’s on the way in Kampen. I had a Mexican style crispy chicken, which was huge and delicious but not overly spicy. We really want to be taking more day trips together.

How have you been?

The Wednesday HodgePodge (August 17, 2022)

Hi everyone. I’m joining the Wednesday HodgePodge again. Here are Joyce’s questions.

1. August is National Back To School Month…how does that make you feel? Share a back-to-school memory.
I don’t really feel much regarding back-to-school time, as I’m not in school anymore (it’s been 17 years since I graduated high school) and my nieces are too young to be in school. I’m so glad to be out of school though.

A back-to-school memory? My first day at the school for the blind I spent fourth till sixth grade at. We went to church to mark the beginning of the school year, as it was a Christian school. I found it all very strange, having never been to a church before, since my parents are atheists. I’m pretty sure I fell asleep during the service though.

2. Something you’ve learned in “the school of life”?
People who get paid to have any sort of relationship with you, won’t stick around for you, so you have no reason to stay for them either. Yes, I’m referring to my wish to transfer to another care facility here.

3. Three words to describe your current mood.
Unquiet, determined, sad.

4. A summer food you’ve eaten too much of/are tired of? A summer food you haven’t had enough of?
There isn’t any summer food I’m really tired of, though today I turned down another ice cream cone because I’d had three in the past week already. A summer food I haven’t had enough of? Summer fruit!

5. What small stuff do you sweat that you know you shouldn’t?
I tend to get very easily frustrated, so quite a lot, but lately I’ve also tried to solve small problems more rather than just not caring. An example are air bubbles in my clay. The reason that I do try to solve the problem now, is that I know how to (to an extent) rather than just having to wait for my pieces to be cured and then deciding whether they go in the trash or are just about good enough to be displayed. It’s a tricky balancing act of trying not to sweat the small stuff but also trying not to be careless.

6. Insert your own random thought here.
Yesterday, we had daytime temperatures of 30°C. It isn’t expected to get this hot again anytime this year. My husband, not surprisingly, started the Christmas prep WhatsApp group with his family. He always does in mid-August. I, too, before we got to discuss this, started reading a winter-themed chapter book.

#WeekendCoffeeShare (August 13, 2022)

Hi everyone. How are you doing? Want to join me for #WeekendCoffeeShare? I’ve had all my coffee for the day, but I’m soon grabbing a Dubbelfrisss (my favorite soft drink). Let’s have a drink and let’s catch up.

If we were having coffee, I would start out by asking how your weather is. Ours has been hot most of the week. Today, the weather institute officially recorded a heatwave, meaning five days in a row of daytime highs of at least 25°C, including three days of at least 30°C. Today, the temperature reached 32°C here. Tomorrow, it may even get a little hotter. The last officially-recorded heatwave was in 2020.

If we were having coffee, I would tell you the woman from the care home down the road from mine was very happy with the polymer clay necklace I gifted her for her birthday. I stayed for a while to have coffee and apple pie.

If we were having coffee, I would tell you that my orthopedic shoes still aren’t as they should be. I developed two small blisters on my feet after a short walk yesterday evening. Granted, I’d also taken a longer walk in the morning without much trouble, but blisters really shouldn’t happen anyway.

If we were having coffee, I’d complain about the care facility’s WiFi once again. Oh wait, yesterday, I showed gratitude for it, but today I’m complaining, because three days in a row it’s now gone out in the evening. I am currently redirecting my iPhone’s mobile data to my laptop because I was in the middle of typing this blog post when the stupid thing went down.

If we were having coffee, lastly I’d share that I did start on the green polymer clay unicorn I mentioned this afternoon after all. I’ve decided it’s going to make a great present for the student staff who’s leaving at the end of this month. I so far only made the surface it’s going to stand on, which is currently in the oven. It took me 45 minutes to create a slab for it that was relatively free of air bubbles. Not completely, but enough that there hopefully won’t be huge holes in the bottom of the thing. Not that they will be seen, if they are there, when the unicorn stands on its surface, but well.

How have you been?

Unicorns, Of Course! #SoCS

Unicorns are my favorite mythical creatures. When I saw that this week’s prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “U” – to start your post with a word beginning with the letter “U” -, I of course had to go with “unicorn”.

Not that I know much about the origins or meanings of unicorns. I mean, I love reading chapter books about them, in which they are always described as having magical powers. For example, in the Branches Books early chapter book Bo’s Magical New Friend, a unicorn tries to help discover her friend’s power. In a chapter book for slightly more advanced readers, Twilight, Say Cheese! by Daisy Sunshine, a unicorn has trouble containing her power of invisibility.

In addition to books, I love stuffed unicorns. I have two. One is Sophie/Rainbow, who has two names because two of my blog readers independently came up with names for her. She is a white unicorn with rainbow-colored mane. The other is completely white and I call her Snowflake.

I also love crafting unicorns out of polymer clay, though I haven’t done it much lately because I haven’t found a way to prevent the thing it stands on from bending and/or developing air bubbles. I do really want to create another unicorn soon, but am too busy with the presents for various people to get to that one. I already have the colors I want to use for my next polymer clay unicorn though. It will be three different intensity levels of a bright green.