#WeekendCoffeeShare (April 10, 2022)

Posted on by Astrid

Hi everyone! I’m joining #WeekendCoffeeShare today. I just had a soft drink and a glass of water, but if you’d like a cup of coffee or tea, I’m pretty sure my staff can make you one too. Let’s have a drink and let’s catch up.

If we were having coffee, I’d tell you that a fellow client passed away on Wednesday. He had had COVID back in February, like most of us, but he didn’t fully recover. This client had been hospitalized several times during December and January because of seizures, but these finally seemed to be well under control. Unfortunately, COVID was the last straw. He had been on a feeding pump ever since he’d had COVID, but because he became increasingly uncomfortable and unresponsive, the doctor and staff decided to discontinue his feedings on Monday. I last saw him alive Monday evening. He actually lifted up his body, smiled and squealed with delight upon hearing my voice. I made the conscious decision, having already been informed that he’d be dying soon, to keep this memory as my last memory of him while alive.

If we were having coffee, I’d share that I finally managed to craft another butterfly with the silicone mold I’d gotten for Christmas last December. I badly wanted to create a butterfly to go with the fellow client’s coffin, but wasn’t sure whether I could use the mold. However, other tutorials seemed even more complicated, so I eventually decided to give it a try. I did the wings in Fimo Effect color blue ice quartz. The body is pacific blue and the antennae are black.

If we were having coffee, I would also tell you that I have finally given in to the polymer clay color mixing thing and bought a precision kitchen scale. That plus a collection of 60 Fimo soft color recipes. Of course, I haven’t tried Fimo professional yet, but if I have to believe my staff, the colors I’ve mixed so far turn out gorgeous despite not being done with the true primary colors.

If we were having coffee, I’d tell you about the nationwide cerebral palsy day I went to yesterday. Of course, because the ParaTransit taxi had arrived at 8AM and we didn’t have to pick up any other passengers along the way, I was in Apeldoorn, where the day would be held, by 9AM. Thankfully, I had called my mother-in-law when I entered the taxi and she’d made sure to be there on time too.

The day started with a live-streamed lecture by Erik Scherder, a neuroscientist from Amsterdam. The message was quite similar to the one he’d conveyed in 2018 when I’d attended the cerebral palsy day too: that exerting yourself physically is needed to stimulate your overall neurological wellbeing. In 2018, the lecture had mostly been geared towards (young) adults, while yesterday it was more focused on children and their parents.

I attended two workshops during the day. One was on aging with cerebral palsy, mostly geared towards those age 40+, so I was a little outside of the scope, but I could relate (sad as it may be) to some of the increasing discomfort that older adults with CP face. The other was a yoga class.

As regular readers of my blog might know, I am not 100% sure I even have cerebral palsy, in that my parents never told me and, by the time I was an adult, things got so overshadowed with other diagnoses it’s unclear. For this reason, I felt validated knowing that I appeared not to be the most mildly affected person, strange as this may seem. In fact, during the yoga class, we had to loosen up our muscles and my mother-in-law told me to loosen up. Someone else half-joked: “That’s about the hardest thing to tell a spastic.” That made me feel good.

How have you been?

Tuesday, July 14

Posted on by Astrid

Hi all on this rainy Tuesday evening. Here in the Netherlands at least, the summer is hardly a summer to be honest. What a contrast with last year!

I’m feeling uninspired today, but I do want to write. I hope yesterday’s post didn’t just attract the engagement because I predicted it wouldn’t. Regardless, I think I like the ability to ramble.

I started jewelry-making back up again last week. It’s still pretty hard and frustrating. I mean, I have to gather the right supplies and I keep forgetting something. Last week, I ordered wire, but it was too thick for the thinnest needle and yet the beads wouldn’t fit over the slightly thicker needle. I as a result managed to make only one simple bracelet so far.

Today I ordered some additional supplies, but I forgot to order clasps. My husband asked me to make a bracelet or necklace for his sister, who had her birthday last week. Not that she wears a lot of jewelry, but he thought it might be a kind gesture. I ordered some heart with dog paws pendants, because she loves dogs. Here’s hoping I can make something decent-looking with the supplies I have at hand right now.

In other news, I got a haircut on Thursday. My hair is quite a bit shorter than it was before. I like its current length though. It’s kind of wavy now and feels a bit tougher when brushing through it with my fingers. Since that’s one of my main stims and I like the feel, I think I may keep my hair at this length. My husband has so far only seen the picture, as he didn’t visit last week-end. I will be going to our house this coming
Saturday though.

Today despite the rain I managed three walks. Not long walks, but long enough. I also did a short yoga practice. I just googled yoga for beginners and selected a YouTube video. I didn’t complete the full practice, but I managed to do some. My day activities staff helped me by explaining what the woman in the video was doing. I liked it.

I also listened to some women’s magazine on audio. It was a nice way of unwinding.

I didn’t rest as much as I had originally planned to, but still I feel okay. It’s now nearly 9PM and, though I’m physically tired, I’m not as overwhelmed as I was yesterday.

Hope you all are doing well.

Lovin’ Lately (June 19, 2020)

Posted on by Astrid

Hi everyone and welcome to another edition of Lovin’ Lately, in which I share all the things I’ve been loving recently. I’m joining in with Friday Favorites.

Today was a pretty busy day. It was the Friday we have day activities (every other Friday is a day off). As such, I’ve been pretty active. This is why I didn’t sit down to write until now that it’s past 10PM. With no further ado, let me start.

1. Netflix. Last Saturday, in an impulse, I decided to get a Netflix subscription again. I always get the basic one, as I, being blind, don’t need HD video or multiple screens to watch on. I wanted to see the Netflix original documentary series Diagnosis. This is really fascinating!

2. My yoga mat. My husband brought it to me last week and I finally unfolded it this evening to get some working out done. I tried several yoga apps, but haven’t found one that I like yet. Then again, I love doing yoga just the way I like it. I mean, I’m pretty inflexible and don’t have much strength in my muscles at all, but if I don’t practise, it will remain this way. I tried a beginner’s yoga class with the app Down Dog, but couldn’t follow it without being able to see the video. Still, I loved the feel of working out.

3. Journaling prompt collections. I’ve probably mentioned half a dozen times already that I love to collect books of writing prompts, particularly those geared towards journaling. This week, I got a few good ones. The Goddess Journaling Workbook by Beatrix Minerva Linden is great. I already worked on some of the prompts over the past few days, as you can see. I however also love The Year of You by Hannah Braime.

4. A stuffed pillow. I got to borrow one from another client here at the care facility earlier this week and was totally in love with it. I kept stroking its soft side as I dozed off to sleep.

5. My Fitbit. This is by no means a new product, but I just want to mention it as a way to celebrate the huge step achievement I reached this week. So far this week, I got over 56K steps. This includes a short elliptical workout this evening. My Fitbit doesn’t count the yoga workout.

What products have you been lovin’ lately?

Tuesday Ramblings

Posted on by Astrid

Today I don’t know what I want to write about. I’m struggling a bit. Had a hard session with my community psychiatric nurse this afternoon. During the last bit of it and after it for a while, my leg kept trembling. It generally does when I’m very emotional.

I think a switch of personality happened during the session too. I’m not sure it was a full switch or just passive influence. I feel like a fraud for thinking this really happened.

In other news, I ordered a new iPhone last Saturday and it arrived yesterday. Today, I installed it. I got most things working pretty well. I got the iPhone SE 2020, which is much like the iPhone 8 but with better battery capacity, higher processor speed and a slightly better camera. It does take a little getting used to, particularly because it’s larger and heavier than the old SE I used to have. I can’t imagine that this is really the smallest iPhone currently on the market. It is though. It also feels weird that the home button isn’t actually a button anymore. Thankfully this model still does have a home button though and doesn’t require face ID.

I walked three times today. Unfortunately, I didn’t meet my step goal and, as I’m supposed to go to bed in half an hour or so, I don’t think I will.

I asked my husband to bring my yoga mat and weights when he visits me again. I looked at some fitness blogs yesterday. Though I don’t think I’ll ever be a fitness blogger even as much as I’m a book blogger, these bloggers did inspire me to get active. I googled a basic beginner’s fitness plan. I haven’t started with it yet, but hopefully will soon. I also really hope to be starting yoga again soon.

How are you all doing?

Yoga and Other Movement-Based Self-Care Practices #AtoZChallenge

Posted on by Astrid

Welcome to day 25 in the #AtoZChallenge. Wowah, can you believe after today there’s just one more day in April? Time does seem to fly.

Today I want to write about yoga and other movement-based approaches to self-care. I know, I already discussed exercise briefly a few weeks ago. However, there are other benefits to yoga too.

If you are not a yoga person, that’s totally okay. Maybe you think it’s a little too alternative for you. Or maybe, like me, you believe you don’t have the physical flexibility or balance to do it. Well, let me tell you (and myself!) that yoga truly has some benefits that aren’t spiritual at all and that anyone can do it. You may need to modify the poses. For example, when I go into tree pose (putting one leg up to your other thigh), I always touch a wall with one hand. I just don’t have the balance to do the “proper” pose and never will.

Yoga is good for both your mind and body. As well as being good for flexibility and balance, it helps you develop deep breathing, calms the mind and can even help with pain relief.

There are many kinds of yoga. Hatha yoga is what most people in the western world see as the regular kind of yoga. Maybe I didn’t do it properly but it never quite felt like a workout except for my flexibility. There are however also types of yoga that are actually a real workout, such as power yoga. However, I don’t recommend you try those if you’re a beginner or starting back freshly after a while. No matter how eager you are to get moving in these times of lockdown, you’d much better start slow.

In addition to yoga, there are other types of movement that will help you get in physical shape. For example, pilates is a way of working your muscles. Dancing (even just hopping with music on) counts as well.

How do you get moving?

Gratitude List (March 23, 2019) #TToT

Posted on by Astrid

This week was better than last week. Still, when I filled out a check-in questionnaire on an app called Pacifica, it said I scored as severely depressed. Well, apparently that’s my normal state.

Today, I am feeling pretty good. I want to share the things I’m grateful for, so I’m once again joining in with #TToT.

1. A full Monday at day activities. Like I mentioned last week, from this week on, I’ll be going to day activities three full days (Monday, Tuesday and Friday) plus Wednesday morning. I liked it on Monday afternoon.

2. Lorazepam. On Tuesday, I was pretty unquiet all day. Thankfully, I’d taken my PRN tranquilizer with me to day activities. I took it in the afternoon. At first, it just made me feel drowsy, but I eventually calmed down too.

3. Stuffed animals. I spent some time Tuesday afternoon at another group at day activities, where I tried to relax in a recliner. They have a large stuffed dog, which I was allowed to hold.

Also, last Thursday before leaving for work at 5AM, my husband covered me in stuffed animals as I went back to sleep. That’s so awesome!

4. Two long walks with my support coordinator. On both Wednesday and Thursday, we took an hour-long walk.

5. Yoga. On Thursday, I tried to do some yoga on my bed, because I couldn’t find my yoga mat. Turned out it had disintegrated and my husband had thrown it out. I ordered a new yoga mat on Thursday, which arrived at my in-laws on Friday. I picked it up today and it is great. It is not as thick as the one I used to have, but thick enough at 1.5cm. I tried some yoga again today.

6. Mindfulness apps. I tried meditating regularly using Insight Timer this week. It was good. I also, like I said, got an app called Pacifica, which helps me track my mood and health habits. I like it.

7. Beautiful weather yesterday. The temperature reached 19 degrees Celsius, which meant we could have coffee outside in the afternoon at day activities. The staff also put up the cocoon swing, which I always love.

8. Sleep. Yesterday, I was feeling exhausted and had a headache. My husband noticed an dtold me to go to bed. I slept for over twelve hours last night. Though my quality of sleep could be better, since I snore awfully, I feel okay now energy-wise.

What are you grateful for?

My Favorite Ways of Staying Active

Posted on by Astrid

Today, I am joining in with the RagTag Daily Prompt for Thursday. It is “Exercise“. I am a pretty sedentary person, but nonetheless, I love getting moving every once in a while. Here are my favorite ways of staying active both physically and mentally.

1. Walking. My absolute favorite way of physical exercise has to be walking. Due to my disabilities, I am not safe leaving the house on my own for a walk, but I do enjoy walks with my support staff or other people. As regular readers of this blog know, I go for a long walk each Monday at day activities. This week, unfortunately, it started to pour when we’d just been out of the door for five minutes, so we had to return. Both today and yesterday though, I went for an hour-long walk with my support coordinator.

2. Swimming. My second most favorite way of exercising physically has to be swimming. We do it at day activities every other Tuesday. My Fitbit activity tracker is water-proof, so it tracks my swimming activity too.

3. Going on gym equipment. I have an elliptical at home, which I really need to use more often. I manage twice a week on average, but sometimes I don’t go for over a week.

I also discussed with my support worker getting myself a gym membership. There’s a gym in the nearby city that has services for people who suffered brain injury. I’d love to go there.

4. Yoga. I used to take yoga lessons at the institution in Nijmegen many years ago, but I quit eventually. Then I tried to practise on my own. My husband eventually borrowed my yoga mat for his own exercise, then threw it out because it’d disintegrated. I just ordered myself anew one, which should arrive tomorrow. I tried to do yoga on my bed today, but that wasn’t really ideal.

5. Horseback riding. This isn’t particularly exercise-y if you ask me, since we just step around. However, it is an activity that I commit to once a week and that keeps me healthy – or so I’d like to think.

What are your favorite ways of staying healthy?

Activities That Give Me Inner Peace

Posted on by Astrid

I’ve been feeling a bit low again, but not as low as I was early last month. I’m not even really depressed, but just rather uninspired. I’d rather play games on my iPHone than do something productive, like blogging. To get myself writing again, I looked at The Self Exploration Journal once again. One of the prompts is about activities that give you inner peace. Here goes.

1. Yoga. I really need to do this more often. I don’t practice yoga much, as it feels like exercise yet doesn’t lead to weight loss. However, it does have other benefits. For example, it can help with my flexibility. It can also definitely help me find inner peace.

2. Meditation. I have Insight Timer, a free meditation app, on my phone. I love it, but I don’t practice meditation nearly enough. I tried it again yesterday, but when I was in the middle of a guided meditation, my husband came home.

3. Listening to soothing music. I used to always have calming whale sounds on when in the snoezelen (sensory) room at my old day activities. Unfortunately, I couldn’t copy the CD when moving day activities and it’s no longer being sold. I have yet to try to listen to my own soothing music on Spotify when in the sensory room. I really want to do more imagery-based activities using soothing music too.

4. Walking. I love going for walks. It truly helps me process my thoughts and move towards greater inner peace. It’s a more active way of creating inner balance, whereas the above three activities are more passive. I mean, yes, yoga requires movement, but it doesn’t require as much movement as does walking.

5. Exercise. Going on the elliptical has the same effect as walking, but amplified. I do this alone, whereas I always go on walks with other people. This means that I can quietly process my thoughts when on the elliptical, while at the same time getting my much-needed activity.

6. Writing. I really want to do this everyday, like I did when starting this blog. I really want to do more freewrites or diary entries too. This should definitely help me process my thoughts and gain inner peace.

What activities give you inner peace?

Practising Self-Care

Posted on by Astrid

Yesterday, carol anne of Therapy Bits asked a question about self-care. This really got me thinking. Is self-care a challenge for us? How do we practise self-care?

Self-care can really be interpreted in several ways. Sometimes, what is self-care one day may be the opposite the next. For example, many people see self-care as pampering yourself. While this is good in moderation, it can become destructive if done too much. For example, we like to buy ourselves comfort food as self-care. However, this used to quickly turn into overeating. Now we recently realized that a small bag of sugar-free candy is just as enjoyable as a large bag of sugary candy and it is a lot less unhealthy.

Remember, any self-care activity can turn destructive if done in excess. We happen to be the classic overindulgent type, but exercise or healthy eating can also become an obsession.

We definitely find self-care a challenge particularly when we feel depressed. Like I said, we’re the overindulgent type, so then we sleep and eat all day. When we aren’t depressed, self-care comes relatively easy.


There are a variety of self-care activities we like. For example, we like to practise yoga and mindfulness. We also love the sensory room at day actvities.

Writing is also a good self-care activity for us. I am happy that we relaunched this blog, so that we can write without the pressure of having to create “good” content, as this was realy holding us back on our other blog.

We also try to take good care of our physical health. We are overweight and have been trying to lose weight over the past fourteen months. Though it’s been somewhat successful, it’s not been as successful as we hoped it’d be. We recently started a food log again, but we can’t keep up with it everyday. We try to exercise regularly too, though over the past few weeks that’s been hard due to the hot weather.

What do you do to practise self-care?