#WeekendCoffeeShare (April 19, 2025)

Posted on by Astrid

Hi everyone. I’m joining #WeekendCoffeeShare tonight. It’s almost 11PM here, so definitely no more coffee for me. If you’d like to grab a drink, feel free to and let’s chat.

If we were having coffee, first I’d talk about the weather. We finally got rain. Not as much as was originally thought and not nearly enough, but we got rain. The temperatures have also been lower, usually around 15°C. This is still warmer than normal, but I still yearn for 20°C.

If we were having coffee, then I’d tell you that, as a result of the rainy weather, I haven’t walked as much as I did in previous weeks. I still kept my perfect streak with respect to my movement goal on my Apple Watch, but didn’t meet my exercise goal everyday.

If we were having coffee, I’d share that I’ve finally been crafting again. I created a polymer clay bear holding a heart for my support coordinator, who is on maternity leave. Unfortunately, one of its ears fell off during baking, but thankfully I noticed it in time and was able to add a new ear.

I also made another attempt at creating a polymer clay trinket dish today, but failed once again.

If we were having coffee, I’d report that I had a meeting with the intellectual disability physician, who prescribes my psych meds, on Wednesday. The good news is that I’m allowed to further taper my antipsychotic. The bad news is no answers regarding my tremors. She thinks they may be related to my spastic cerebral palsy and this means that they can get worse when I’m stressed.

If we were having coffee, I’d tell you that I had a dietitian’s appt on Wednesday too. This went well. I’m staying in a sort of acceptable weight range and not having binge eating episodes or purging. My next appt will be in three months.

If we were having coffee, I’d moan about the temp worker situation once again. On Wednesday, when like I said I had two appointments, the staff wanted to orient a new “regular” temp worker to me. As soon as they told me, I told them that this wasn’t going to work out that day, but they kept telling me to see what’d come out of my doctor’s appt first and then we’d discuss it again. Well, no-one ever allowed for any discussion after the appt and, when the time came for the worker to be oriented, the staff doing the orienting kept pushing me in overt and covert ways to accept him. Like, the temp worker was constantly sneakily, without talking, being in my presence. This gave me a horribly unsafe feeling, because I, being blind, couldn’t be sure whether he was there or not.

The staff doing the orienting at one point seemed to show some understanding and told me she was going to talk it over with the other staff. She came back to tell me that it’d been agreed between my assigned staff, the support coordinator, behavior specialist and the team manager that, if I refused him now, I’d had my chance. She never told me who’d told her that when she was “talking it over”, so I assumed it was my assigned staff. I still refused the temp worker and to this day feel horrible about the whole situation. I mean, this whole agreement among the powers-that-be is showing that they believe I refuse staff for their one orientation moment just because I feel like it. Honestly, I still disagree with that whole thing about just one orientation moment and then they’re as regular as the regular staff who’ve worked here for years.

At one point, I went into the communal room and another staff, one of my “favorites”, was there. She asked me what was up and I explained that I had two appts that originally the staff didn’t think I could handle in one day and now they added this orientation thing to it too. The temp worker was present too and I told him it wasn’t that I didn’t like him, but he hadn’t even spoken a word to me during his previous shifts here and now he was creeping up on me. He apparently had been instructed to do so. The other staff understood and I actually talked a little to the temp worker.

Unfortunately, when I read my daily log notes for the past week today, I saw there wasn’t a single word about how I’d talked to him eventually. Neither was there anything about how I’d accepted the other temp worker (who’d had her orientation moment with me last week) for my activity on Tuesday, nor that I showed the new student staff my clay yesterday on his first shift here. This is relevant because it signifies that they’re still only reporting my challenging behavior and not the things I do accomplish in spite of the stress it gives me.

If we were having coffee, I would once again end on a positive note by sharing some small pleasures of the week. First was the BBQ on Thursday. It was good. Next up is a visit to the next town’s market yesterday. My spouse was a little surprised that I didn’t buy olives, as I usually buy those when going to the market. I did buy candy. I also went to the supermarket to buy some ingredients for my smoothies. We also went to that town’s coffee shop run by disabled people and had the most delicious caramel latte.

Speaking of which, I’d tell you that I’ve been having a new interest lately: coffee brewing. I’d really like to be able to create my own coffees. Still need to look into all the necessary supplies, but it should be fun.

Friday Feels (September 13, 2024)

Posted on by Astrid

Hi everyone. Today I’m participating in Friday Feels. The idea is to answer three questions about the past week and share an F word related to it. The questions are:


  1. What made me happy?

  2. What made me sad?

  3. What made a difference?

F word

My F word for this week is “fall”. Last Saturday, it looked like summer wasn’t going to end anytime soon, since the daytime temperature reached 27°C. From this past Monday on though, the weather’s been considerably chillier and rainier. On Wednesday, the temperature didn’t even get above 14°C. Today is slightly less chilly, but the nights are truly getting colder.

What made me happy?

First, Chinese takeout for dinner on Monday to celebrate a fellow client’s birthday.

Second, a treat of one of my favorite biscuits with my afternoon coffee today.

Third, the fact that I was able to get the WiFi on my iPhone to work properly again here. It turned out that turning off a privacy setting on my phone for this particular network, solved the issue.

Last but certainly not least, swimming! On Wednesday, I heard that two of my fellow residents were going swimming at the institution pool that evening. Usually, about seven or eight residents go and it’s too overwhelming for me, but since there was another activity too, just these two guys were going. I took up the courage to ask my staff whether I could go too. It was amazing!

What made me sad?

I experienced a slight increase in bad memories over the past week. Mostly, they were manageable, which is why I’m not using the word “flashback” to describe them.

What made a difference?

There are several things that made a difference this week. First, the fact that one of my trusted staff returned from vacation this week. Most are still on holiday, so the next few weeks will be somewhat difficult still, but I managed this week.

Second, the weather, like I said, is very different and it made a difference, in that I could sleep under my weighted blanket without sweating excessively. This is important, because until now I thought something might be wrong with me. I guess not.

Third, the new agreement that staff will no longer unlock the door for me when I want to elope and will physically restrain me if necessary to keep me from for instance climbing over the fence. I saw the agreement on Tuesday and, though I still have some questions about it, I am for the most part relieved about it.

#WeekendCoffeeShare (July 13, 2024)

Posted on by Astrid

Hi everyone. I’ve once again not been blogging, but this time it’s not because I’m struggling. Well, I still don’t feel the greatest, but the main reason I haven’t blogged is that something else has caught my attention. I’ll talk about it in a minute. Want a coffee? I’m joining #WeekendCoffeeShare once again. It’s past 10PM, so no coffee for me, but since this is a virtual get-together, you can have whatever you like. Let’s have a drink and let’s catch up.

First, if we were having coffee, I’d share about the weather. It’s been all over the place. On Tuesday, it was hot and humid with a daytime high of 30°C. Then we got this giant thunderstorm. Wednesday and Thursday were still okay with daytime temperatures of around 22°C. Yesterday though, it was not just raining all day, but it was freakin’ frigid with a daytime high of 16°C. Today is slightly better.

If we were having coffee, I’d tell you that, despite having my new Apple Watch wristband, I didn’t meet my movement goals each day this week. I blame the weather. I thankfully no longer care as much as I used to and can sit back and relax every now and again rather than having to keep up with my activity rings. I did try to walk each day (except for yesterday) and went swimming on Thursday too.

If we were having coffee, next I’d tell you that, yesterday, I went to an Eye Association meeting for young people who are blind or visually impaired (and a few who have an eye condition but can still see quite well). I originally thought I’d be too old to qualify as a “young person”, but the target age group is 18-45. I had a good time, but towards the end got quite overloaded. I had a near-meltdown when the taxi driver called me but I couldn’t hear him over the noise in the cafe in which the meeting was held. I for a bit thought I upset the entire group and wouldn’t be welcome anymore, but thankfully it wasn’t this bad according to several people.

If we were having coffee, lastly I’d tell you all about my latest obsession. I originally wanted to write a separate post about it on Thursday, but got distracted by the actual thing. It’s learning Spanish on Duolingo. I’m currently still at the early A1 level of proficiency. My spouse and mother-in-law have both been learning Spanish on this app for several months. What got me into it though was a conversation in a Facebook group about language learning. Some people said Duolingo isn’t always correct, but I’m not sure whether they were referring to a specific language. I can see why though in a way, as for example early on in the Spanish course, you’re learning the word “elegante”, which Duolingo claims translates to “elegant”. Now I’ve never heard an English-speaking person use the word “elegant” in everyday conversation. I honestly couldn’t care less though, as if I ever get to a point where I can actually talk in Spanish outside of the app, I’ll teach myself the finer details of conversation.

#WeekendCoffeeShare (July 6, 2024)

Posted on by Astrid

Hi everyone. Today, I’m joining #WeekendCoffeeShare. As I start typing my post, I’ve just had dinner, but I probably won’t be finished with my post until after my evening coffee, as I’ll take a break from writing for my evening activity time slot. In case I am able to offer you a virtual coffee – which I will anyway, since it’s virtual -, I will offer you a stroopwafel biscuit with it too. I bought those at the supermarket this afternoon, because the staff ordering groceries this week either forgot to order large cookies for the weekend or thought they’re bad for our health. Anyway, let’s have a drink and let’s catch up.

If we were having coffee, first I’d moan about the weather. It’s been rainy and chilly most of the week with daytime temperatures barely reaching 20°C. On Wednesday, the daytime high in fact was as low as 16°C.

If we were having coffee, next I’d share that I tore my Apple Watch wristband in two last week. That is, I pulled a tear into it when putting it on once, then when trying to put it on once more thinking I could still use another hole, I tore the entire thing in two, thereby dropping my Apple Watch. Thankfully, it didn’t break, but I couldn’t use it for a couple of days because of having no wristband. I mean, the wristband that broke wasn’t the original one, but somehow I must’ve discarded part of the original, since I could only find half of it.

I initially tried to order a new wristband and screen protector online, but the Apple Store would only let me pay by credit card and, though I did manage to order a screen protector off Bol.com, it was delivered to my in-laws’ house and hadn’t been delivered there yet by the time my mother-in-law visited me on Tuesday. I finally decided to just give it a try and order a wristband at another store and have it delivered to the care home. Like I’ve said a few times, the care home does have its own postal code, but I was originally instructed to address mail to the main building and add my home as second address line. Bol.com won’t accept second address lines and so I always used to have them deliver to my in-laws. Not anymore, since the wristband, addressed to the care home, arrived promptly and so did the screen protector I ordered that evening. Now I’ll have two screen protectors once my spouse brings the one that’s lying around at my in-laws’, but who cares? I have a working Apple Watch at last!

If we were having coffee, I’d tell you that the fact that it was raining plus the fact that I didn’t have my Apple Watch meant I didn’t walk nearly as much over the past week as I usually do. On Monday, I got pretty frustrated, because a temp worker happened to be assigned my two-hour activity time slot three times this week. Granted, he’s a regular temp worker here, but I had not yet trusted him enough to do anything other than play games and go for medium-long walks. On Monday I was anticipating two hours of dice games because of the weather, but thankfully it stopped raining eventually and we could go for a short walk.

Then on Tuesday, he told one of my most trusted staff that he’d love to work with clay with me. On Monday, the way he’d suggested we work with clay, it sounded as though he was just rattling off my activity list and I don’t do clay with staff I don’t trust to show at least some interest in it. I mean, they don’t need to know anything about polymer clay or even crafts in general, but if they’re the type to just sit around playing on their phone, a complex activity like polymer clay isn’t for them and me to work on together.

So on Wednesday, I decided to take the plunge and make a unicorn with him. At first, I used Cernit, which was way too soft, so I eventually gave up and chose Fimo. He asked to take the finished unicorn home with him to show his children, which I was happy to allow him to after I’d taken a picture, since I have many unicorns anyway.

Polymer Clay Unicorn

If we were having coffee, I’d tell you I started tapering one of my medications yesterday. It’s not the medication I originally wanted to taper, which was my antipsychotic, aripiprazole (Abilify). Instead, the intellectual disability physician suggested I discontinue my morning dose of topiramate (Topamax), which was supposed to help against nightmares and flashbacks. So far, I’m not noticing any difference good or bad, but it’s still early days of course.

If we were having coffee, lastly I’d tell you all to come to my home tomorrow. No, not really, but we will have a barbecue here. The parents of one of my fellow clients organize it, so I decided to buy them some chocolate as a thank-you gift.

Gratitude List (April 26, 2024) #TToT

Posted on by Astrid

Hi everyone. How have you been? I’m participating in Ten Things of Thankful with a gratitude post once again. It’s been a while. I however have quite a few thankfuls to share, I think, so let’s go.

1. I’m grateful for homemade pizza. My spouse, mother-in-law and I made it together at my in-laws’ house (my father-in-law wasn’t there) last Saturday after the CP conference.

2. I’m grateful for a side-by-side bike ride on Sunday. I was assigned an extremely tall staff member for my one-on-one and, for those not aware, I am short myself. This makes walking with him quite a challenge, as we haven’t yet figured out a way for him to guide me that doesn’t cause me pain. However, I came up with the idea of biking instead.

3. I am grateful for the fact that my attempt at making overnight oats on Monday turned out to be a success! Last time I made them, I added way too much milk.

4. I am grateful because, on Tuesday, I was able to cook köfte for my fellow residents and staff. It took me quite some time, but that’s not a problem.

5. I am grateful for French fries on Wednesday. Oh, I’m making more than half of this list about food, but okay.

6. I am grateful for an opportunity to go swimming yesterday. I had gone swimming twice last week, once with my own home’s residents and once with a small group. I hadn’t expected to be able to join the small group this week again and swimming for my home was canceled because most residents were on the annual trip. However, I was able to join the small group anyway.

7. I am grateful for a trip to the institution museum this afternoon. It’s a really small museum, but it was interesting to learn about the history of the institution. Plus, we got free mini pancakes! Oh wait, that’s another food-related thankful…

8. I’m grateful for a day without rain today. We had rain most of the week and, though I could go on walks everyday inbetween showers, I couldn’t go out nearly as much as I’d have liked. Today though was a rain-free day and we even had a bit of sunshine.

9. I am grateful for an appointment with the nurse practitioner who works at my local GP practice re my decreasing mobility. I’ll have a physical therapy appt soon too but I’d really like to know what’s causing my mobility impairment (CP or something else) and whether a decrease in mobility is to be expected or what can be done about it.

10. Last but not least, I am so grateful I seem to be slowly crawling out of the pit of depression I was in.

My Favorite Type of Weather

Posted on by Astrid
Daily writing prompt
What is your favorite type of weather?
View all responses

I am pretty sure I answered this question before when rambling on for one of Paula Light’s former #TGIF posts. At least, I did share that Erwin Kroll, the Netherlands’ most well-known meteorologist during the 1990s, said in an interview for the kids’ audio magazine I subscribed to at the time, that partly cloudy weather with a daytime temperature of 22°C was his favorite and I probably added that mine wouldn’t be far off. I’d prefer slightly warmer weather, but I don’t care for daytime highs in the high 20s, let alone 30s or above.

At night, I prefer a temperature below 10°C. Oh wait, I’m being a bit difficult, as with daytime highs in the 20s, you hardly ever get night-time lows below 10°C.

I used to hate rain with a passion, but now, though I don’t care for it, I will still go outside if it’s drizzling a little. I still can’t stand snow, sleet or hail.

As a side note, I had a discussion with one of my staff a few days back. He said he’d love for the daytime temperature to be 20°C now. I said me too, and we will more than likely get our way sooner rather than later given the speed of climate change, but this does mean summer highs will be in the 40s too. Be careful what you wish for…

Walking and Making Smoothies

Posted on by Astrid

Hi everyone. I have been struggling a bit lately, but today was a good day. I went on three walks, one over an hour and 4.5km long. It rained for most of the day, but I’m not made of sugar, as they say in Dutch. I honestly have no idea where that saying comes from and what sugar has to do with not being water-resistant. I mean, there are many other substances that will melt or otherwise dissolve in water. As a side note, we only had a slight drizzle on some of our walks, so it wasn’t like I got soaked in the rain.

When the rain did come pouring down, I decided to make a smoothie. I had ordered some supplies online yesterday. Like I’ve explained before, my care home does have its own postal code but officially you need to address things to the main building, adding the home in an additional address line. Most stores though don’t allow for two address lines. So, in an attempt to bypass the need to have stuff sent to my in-laws and wait a week for my spouse to bring it here, I decided to say “screw it!” and address my order to the home with its own postal code. And guess what? It got delivered right to our doorstep. This is not how I should be handling things if I can avoid it, but it’s quite tempting, honestly. Waiting a week for my stuff rather than having it delivered within 24 hours of my placing my order, isn’t very appealing.

I had ordered carrot juice, mango nectar, agave syrup and hemp seeds. The hemp seeds are in a lot of smoothie recipes and I’d kind of impulsively ordered them to get to the minimum order amount. The person with whom I unpacked my package, didn’t ask anything about the hemp seeds, but the next staff did make a bit of a weirded out sound. I had looked it up online and found out that usually only the shells (which mine have been removed from) contain trace amounts of THC. Nonetheless, I decided not to add them to my first smoothie, which I was going to share with my fellow residents.

I did add carrot juice. I also added frozen mango chunks, which we’d ordered from the online grocery store that delivers to care homes. We added one banana and a pinch of cinnamon.

Honestly, the smoothie turned out a bit thin for my liking, but it was definitely delicious. My spouse later said that ginger and orange make for a better addition to carrot juice, which I think may be true. I’m going to try this with my remaining carrot juice.

The Wednesday HodgePodge (March 1, 2023)

Posted on by Astrid

Hi everyone. It’s Wednesday again, so I’m joining the Wednesday HodgePodge yet again. Here goes.

1. Hello March! Is it coming in like a lion where you live? How do you feel when it rains?
I have no idea what the saying that March comes in like a lion means. Probably something about rain, given the next part of the question. If I’m correct, no, it doesn’t rain here. It’s cold though: 7°C at midday and -4°C at night.

I generally don’t like rainy weather, though I can handle it better than I used to like a year or two ago.

2. What’s something you’d like to do differently this week than the last? Explain.
Last week was better than this week has been so far, so honestly, I wouldn’t really change a thing.

3. March 1st is National Sunkist Citrus Day…do you drink orange juice? Orange, lemon, lime, tangerine, grapefruit…what’s your favorite citrus fruit? A dish you love with a citrus fruit as one of its key ingredients?
I don’t usually drink orange juice. It’s not that I don’t like it, but it’s not among my favorite drinks either. My favorite citrus fruit, if I have to choose one, is the tangerine. I honestly don’t care for anything citrussy except for its scent in essential oil blends.

4. What do you consider to be your culture. Elaborate.
This is a tough question. I don’t particularly associate with my native language (Dutch) or country for that matter. I initially wrote that I sort of consider myself European, but that’s not even true, since I do write in American-style English on my blog, for instance. The only thing that makes me more “European”, besides the obvious fact that the Netherlands is in Europe, is the fact that I’m quite progressive.

Then there are other identities. I am part of many communities online that consider themselves as having a specific culture, such as the autistic/neurodivergent community. I however don’t really associate with that as a culture either. These are more things that define my identity than my culture. These include my gender, race (although that’s a bit problematic for me to admit as a white person, but it’s true), etc.

5. Sum up your February in fifteen words or less.
Not good, but better than January.

6. Insert your own random thought here.
Wanted to share that my husband did bring the unicorn cookie/clay cutters that were supposed to be my Valentine’s Day present last Sunday. One is a rainbow, the next a unicorn head and one a unicorn. I haven’t yet had the chance to try them out.

TGIF: Weather

Posted on by Astrid

Hi all. Fridays are usually pretty active in the blogosphere and there are lots of prompts to choose from on this day. Today, I discovered another one, Paula Light’s TGIF. Today, Paula took the opportunity to talk about the weather and for this reason so will I.

Let me start out with the positives: we had some amazingly warm late summer weather early in the week. Not too hot for my liking, although it did get to 30°C on Tuesday, which I understand is too hot for some. Wednesday was the best: some sunshine but some clouds too, no rain and 25°C during the day.

Thankfully, we did get some much-needed rain too. We got a thunderstorm Tuesday night. My Apple Watch registered sound as loud as 82dB during the storm. I wonder how accurate that is, but well.

We also got some rain yesterday as well as today. Today, in fact, it rained most of the day, but I still managed a short walk outside in the morning.

I tried out my orthopedic shoes, which came back from the shoemaker for the umpteenth time. Well, those who’ve read the orthopedic shoe story before can probably guess what’s next. Yes, indeed, I did get another small blister on my right heel after a walk of not even 20 minutes. I’ve told you guys before that the shoes won’t be fixed until 2034 and I’m more and more confident I’m correct after all.

Despite only managing one walk, I did reach my Apple Watch’s Movement goal today. Okay, I did go on the elliptical for just over 15 minutes too. That went surprisingly well, honestly.

Tomorrow, if we aren’t getting lots of rain in the morning, I’ll likely go for a longer walk. A staff who walks quite fast works my one-on-one shift then. Last time we went on a walk together, I broke my speed record: 13 minutes 11 seconds per km. That’s not very fast, but it’s not slow either. Let’s hope for not much rain tomorrow morning.

Five Activities to Do on Rainy Days #5Things

Posted on by Astrid

Hi everyone on this cloudy and chilly but dry Tuesday evening. Today’s prompt for the #5Things challenge is to share our favorite activities for rainy days. It hasn’t been raining much here at all lately – I guess we’re making up for a rather wet summer. However, the fall and winter usually are our rainy seasons here. I thought I’d participate and share some activities I love to do when it’s raining outside.

1. Listen to music. Contrary to some of the other participants in the challenge, I don’t like watching or listening to the rain. In fact, the sound of heavy rainstorms scares me. To drown out this noise, I like to listen to music, particularly upbeat songs.

Interestingly, I do occasionally love to listen to water sounds on my iPhone, but not specifically rain.

2. Read. When I can’t go outside because of the rain, it’s the perfect time to pick up a book and read. I read a wide variety of books, but, as regular readers of my blog will know, I mostly enjoy memoirs and realistic young adult fiction.

3. Craft. Rainy days are also the perfect time for crafting. Now that it’s not raining as much anymore, I can totally see my creative juices drying up a bit.

4. Chill out. I look forward to relaxing in my recliner, which my husband cleared of most of the stuffed animals and other things that were cluttering it last Sunday. I also love to take extra naps or just chill out under my weighted blanket. Since the day center reopened, lastly, the snoezelen® room is also now available to me at times. All of these activities are especially great for rainy days.

5. Enjoy a hot drink. Particularly hot cocoa, but coffee or green tea will do as well.

What do you like to do when it’s raining?