The Wednesday HodgePodge (May 10, 2023)

Posted on by Astrid

Hi everyone. I’m joining in with the Wednesday HodgePodge once again. Here goes.

1. Did you watch the coronation of King Charles III? Share some of your thoughts about that, or about the royal family in general.
No, didn’t watch it and don’t care for the royal family at all. I honestly am more on Harry and Meghan’s side if I have to choose one. Not that I know much about the entire situation leading up to them being the black sheep, but there are always two sides to a family split-up and everyone seems to side with Charles, William and Catherine. Being that I’m old enough to remember Diana, albeit not very well, this tells me Charles himself is far from perfect and he hardly seems to acknowledge it.

2. What are you the uncrowned queen of?
Here at my home, I’m the uncrowned queen of smoothie making. Sadly, the blender died and the staff think a stick mixer works as well (which it doesn’t), so I’m waiting for my benefits to arrive on the 23rd so that I can buy a new blender.

3. In a box of chocolates which one do you usually go for?
Coffee cream. I also love caramel and anything with nuts in it.

4. Something learned at your mother’s knee?
I’m not sure what this expression means, but if it means something I learned from my mother as a child, I’ll go with my love of crafts and simple food prep. My mother would often help my sister and me bake cookies. Though I haven’t done that in years, it does probably translate into my love of smoothie making.

5. “Like mother, like daughter”…in what way is this saying true for you?
The first thing that comes to mind is a negative one: both of us have really poor distress tolerance. However, both of us are also somewhat creative. We also look somewhat similar: both of us are short, both of us on the curvy side, both with dark hair. My mother has brown eyes though, while mine are blue.

6. Insert your own random thought here.
I am currently reading I Want My Daddy, the latest foster care memoir by Casey Watson. So far, it’s good. It has an intriguing twist that I didn’t expect.

Gratitude List (March 3, 2023)

Posted on by Astrid

Hi everyone. I’m feeling a bit gloomy today, so I’m trying to cheer myself up with a gratitude list. As always, I’m joining Ten Things of Thankful (#TToT). I’m also joining Thankful Thursday, although it being Friday, I’m of course a day late. Better late than never, I guess. Here are my thankfuls.

1. I am grateful for my new laptop. My husband installed Windows and JAWS, my screen reader, on it last Saturday and brought the laptop here on Sunday. So far, I’ve not run into many problems.

2. I am grateful for my unicorn cookie/clay cutters. Like I mentioned a few times, these are a Valentine’s Day present from my husband. I haven’t used them yet, but I think I do like them.

3. I am grateful for some renewed creative inspiration. Too bad this doesn’t really translate into action yet. Here’s hoping it will. I’ve been thinking of restarting soap making again, for example.

4. I am grateful to be back in the reading groove.

5. I am grateful for sleep. Although early in the week, I didn’t sleep all that well, last night and the night before, I did meet my goal of getting eight hours of sleep according to my Apple Watch.

6. I am grateful for improving physical fitness and more walking.

7. I am grateful my orthopedic shoes are back from the umpteenth adjustment. Let’s hope they’re actually right now. So far, at least, I have been able to go for a short walk on them.

8. I am grateful for another nice visit from my mother-in-law yesterday. Normally, she visits on Tuesdays every other week, but we were supposed to have the meeting about my care situation yesterday. The meeting was canceled, but thankfully my mother-in-law visited me anyway.

9. I am grateful for French fries for lunch yesterday with my mother-in-law. And fried chicken. And a little salad. It was delicious!

10. I am grateful for a relatively quiet past few days in the care home I live in with respect to hardly any out-of-control fellow residents. Well, I heard one screaming just when my staff was leaving me after dinner, but it seems calm again.

11. On that note, I am grateful I got through my latest crisis, which involved self-harm, without sustaining major damage. I usually don’t suffer major physical wounds, but I know with my most used self-harm method, it could happen any day.

What are you grateful for?

February 2023 Reflections #WBOYC

Posted on by Astrid

Hi everyone. It’s the last day of the month and this means I’m reflecting back on the month that was. Like last month, I’m joining What’s Been On Your Calendar? (or #WBOYC for short).

The month of February, overall, was slightly better than the month of January. This was reflected in nineteen (including this one) blog posts in 28 days, compared to only thirteen in 31 days last month. However, it wasn’t “good” by any means.

On the 14th, we were supposed to have a meeting about my care, but this was postponed because my support coordinator was off sick. It has now been set for this coming Thursday but my assigned support staff told me it may need to be postponed again.

The last few weeks were okay care-wise and there were even a few days when I received optimal care by this home’s standards. On Friday, I told my assigned staff I might not want to leave this home after all, which she translated to my having decided I don’t want to leave. On Monday I tried talking to her about improvements that would make my life better here, but this led nowhere. Now I’m pretty sure that, since any attempt on my part to talk about improving my care situation leads to “but you can’t expect continuous one-on-one” before I’ve even stated my wishes, I’ve pretty much lost trust in everyone for good. And just so you know, this wasn’t my first attempt to talk about improving my care.

Craft-wise, I didn’t do as well as I’d hoped. I gave up on The Artist’s Way after barely a week and I didn’t expand on my creativity as much as I’d have liked. I was, however, invited to help decide on the monthly theme in the Dutch polymer clay Facebook group, which became “Unicorns” of course. Like I more or less expected, I was the only one contributing, but oh well. At least for once I could participate.

I did read a lot more than I’d expected in the past month. I have been reading more diversely too. This is related to the fact that I had a discussion with my husband a few weeks ago about queer identity.

Also due to said discussion, I decided to finally abandon Christianity. I’ve been struggling with my faith ever since becoming a Jesus follower at the end of 2020 and part of the reason is my queer identity. And just because I’m happily married to a man, doesn’t mean I need to disown that. I could, of course, still call myself a progressive Christ follower, but who would I be kidding then? If the God of the Bible exists, I’m going to be condemned whether I follow Him half-heartedly or not at all.

In the health department, I’ve been doing pretty well. My cardio fitness level is improving and is almost at below-average level rather than low. I also lost 2kg over the month and only need to lose just over 1kg to be at a healthy BMI. I haven’t heard what the institution nurse said yesterday about the cream not working for the burning sensation on my back.

Lastly, I bought a new computer last week, which I’ve now been using for a few days. I’d been dreading Windows 11 for years due to my fear of the unknown I guess, but it works quite similar to Windows 10.

Reading Wrap-Up (February 27, 2023) #IMWAYR

Posted on by Astrid

Hi everyone. I haven’t read as much as I’d hoped over the past week, but at least enough so that I have some things to share for a reading wrap-up. As usual, I’m joining It’s Monday! What Are You Reading? (#IMWAYR).

What I’m Currently Reading

I tried to switch from Goodreads to Storygraph so that I could have an exclusive Did-Not-Finish shelf, but discovered most books aren’t on there in the proper editions. This caused me to switch back and that in turn meant, in my mind, that I had to work through the endless pile of books that I started reading months or even years ago and never finished. As a result, I picked up My Heart and Other Black Holes by Jasmine Warga. Thankfully, I’m relatively able to remember a storyline even from a long time ago.

What I Recently Finished Reading

I finished two of the books I mentioned I was reading last week. The first is Where’s My Mummy? by Maggie Hartley, which was a million times better still than I expected. I usually give foster care memoirs five-star ratings for lack of half stars, but this one definitely deserved it. The second was Sapphire’s Special Power, the second book in the Unicorn University chapter book series by Daisy Sunshine. This had an unexpected twist, which I liked too.

What I Think I’ll Read Next

I’ve seriously been scrolling through Bookshare and seen dozens of interesting-looking books. Ah, so many books, so little time… I badly still want to read the rest of the Unicorn University series, but, being that I’m in my mid-thirties and don’t have any kids myself, I also badly need to get into adult lit, honestly. Not actual literary fiction – I’ll pass that on to my Mom -, but I can’t read mostly chapter books and the occasional YA novel forever. Or maybe that’s just me.

Anyway, when in the middle of this post, I decided to buy Once Taken by Blake Pierce, the second book in the Riley Paige mystery series, off Apple Books. I loved the first book, but since there are literally seventeen books in this series, I wasn’t sure I wanted to continue with it. I just started reading this book now. Oh wait, that’s another book to add to my Currently-Reading shelf on Goodreads. Ah, who cares?

What have you been reading?

Reading Wrap-Up (February 20, 2023) #IMWAYR

Posted on by Astrid

Hi everyone. I seem to finally have gotten back into the reading groove again. There are lots of books I have been trying to get through for literally years – think After the Cure by Deirdre Gould -, but the books I’m currently reading look like they’re going to get finished. At least, some of them. Since I’m a slow reader, I can’t just finish a book that I don’t really like. Anyway, I’m getting ahead of myself. Let me share what I’ve been reading. As usual, I’m joining #IMWAYR, which is short for “It’s Monday! What Are You Reading?” Here goes.

What I’m Currently Reading

Lots of books at once. First, I started reading Sapphire’s Special Power, the second installment in the Unicorn University series by Daisy Sunshine, a while ago. As regular readers of this blog know, I love love LOVE unicorns and my inner child indulges in reading about them. This is a chapter book, but not extremely easy-to-read.

Then, a few weeks ago, I randomly picked up The Marriage Protection Plan by Margaret Watson. This seems like a book I may have to either DNF or take forever to read, since it’s interesting, but not so extremely captivating that I can spend several hours a day, several days in a row reading it.

Last Thursday, Maggie Hartley’s latest foster care memoir, Where’s My Mummy?, came out and I bought it on Apple Books. I’ve been avidly reading it. When it dawned upon me what exactly it was about, I initially didn’t expect to like it as much as I liked her other foster care memoirs, but I’m liking it more and more the farther along I get.

Finally, today, I at last picked up Felix Ever After by Kacen Callender after the book having stared at me forever. After all, I had long felt that reading queer books is against the Christian faith. It may be, but so be it. I read what I want and a god who condemns people for who they are, is not a god I want to associate with.

What I Recently Finished Reading

Nothing. I’m really hoping to finish at least one of the books I’m currently reading this week though.

What I Think I’ll Read Next

I honestly don’t know. I literally have my virtual shelves stacked full of books I may want to read someday. If my inner child gets her way, I’m probably reading something about unicorns again. There are at least five more books in the Unicorn University series after the one I’m currently reading.

I’m also looking for any recommendations for adult lit to read. I’ve discovered I mostly like realistic fiction, such as Lisa Genova’s books (although I never read Still Alice).

Lastly, if anyone has any good recommendations for diversity-related books, that would be great. You know, queer, neurodivergent, BIPOC, etc. main characters. I’m really trying to read more inclusively.

What have you been reading?

Happy Homemaker Monday (December 26, 2022)

Posted on by Astrid

Hi everyone. Today I’m joining Happy Homemaker Monday. Okay, regular readers of this blog will know that I’m not a homemaker. However, my staff, particularly one of the student staff, are trying to get us clients at the care home more involved in the homemaking process. For example, coming in the new year, we may be able to actually help prepare our own meals once a week. (For those not aware, we do get home-cooked meals everyday here and I actually have reasonably good meal prep skills when supervised, but up till this point the staff always cook our meals because it’s quicker.) We will also get our own vegetable garden this spring.

Because we’re required to title our post “Happy Homemaker Monday” and Sandra never got back to me when I asked whether we’re actually required to be homemakers to participate, but the questions do speak to me, I’m not sure whether I’m actually allowed to link up. However, I’m just going to give it a try and if I get kicked off, so be it.

The weather: rainy most of the time and cloudy all of the time. I don’t like it, but am not sure which I find worse: this rainy but relatively mild winter weather or daytime temperatures below 0°C. Let’s just say I can’t wait for spring.

As I look outside my window: well, I have my curtains drawn as it’s evening here and I’m blind so can’t look out my window really. Oh well, I do have an outdoors light outside of my bedroom window which I can see when I have my curtains open and it’s dark outside, which it currently is. It’s probably not interesting enough for sighted people that you guys would want a picture though. Besides, no clue what setting I’d need to set my simple cellphone camera to in order to do this.

Right now I am: typing this blog post. I’m sitting at my desk in my living room. This is really the only place I can comfortably type.

Thinking and pondering: still worrying about my support coordinator doing away with everything agreed upon in the meeting we had on Friday about my care. I received the summary of what was discussed in my inbox on Saturday and it was indeed good. This means I wasn’t dreaming that everyone in the meeting at least said they were on my side. Still, my support coordinator is still on vacation and, even though several staff have been saying she can’t tear apart my day schedule, I’m still kind of worried. Planning to ask the other support coordinator for reassurance later this evening.

How I’m feeling: worried but grateful. Cautiously optimistic too.

On the breakfast plate: four slices of bread with chocolate spread. I normally eat two slices when I do eat bread, but I was in Lobith (at my and my husband’s house) and wasn’t sure I’d be back at the care home for lunch.

On the lunch plate: I had a currant bun and a regular, plain bun. I also had water and I really need to stay more hydrated.

On the dinner plate: I have absolutely no idea how to translate what we had for dinner into English. First, we had a “rundervink”, a kind of beef mince wrapped in bacon. We also had potato tarts. And the kind of salad we had, well, I’m clueless as to what it even was supposed to be. Truthfully, Christmassy (we celebrate Boxing Day as an additional Christmas day here) as it may have been, I didn’t like it. One of the positives about us clients being allowed to help meal prep, is that we finally get a real say in what we’re going to cook.

Listening to: the Healing Harps playlist on Spotify. Not currently – right now, like most of the time, I’m just hearing my text-to-speech software speak and the heating or something buzz -, but it’s the most recent interesting thing I listened to. I love it when trying to sleep or rest.

Watching: polymer clay tutorials on YouTube.

Reading: a Dutch collection of columns by a businesswoman turned special ed teacher. I just finished a book of stories by a Dutch ER doctor. I’m wanting to read more English-language collections of real-life stories too, but not sure where to start.

Around the house: did I even ever share here that my apartment at my current care home has a separate living room and bedroom? I also have a pretty large bathroom and a walk-in storage closet, as well as an enormous terrace. Now that it looks like I’m not going to look for another care home after all (at least not within the near future), I may want to look towards actually making my apartment into a home-like place. I really hope to learn to take better care of it in the new year, which includes keeping it relatively clean and organized but also nicely decorated.

To-do list: I don’t really do those and didn’t make any plans for the next day or even next hour until very recently due to the nature of my support here. Now, thanks to my improved care, I can start actually having a bit of a to-do list. On it currently is finishing the polymer clay unicorn I started crafting with my assigned staff on Friday.

What I’m creating: just cured some polymer clay bear-shaped pieces that I’ll turn into earrings later, as well as a number of beads (well, I’ll still need to drill the holes). This evening, I crafted a turtle out of polymer clay, which is still waiting to go in the oven until I can cure it together with the aforementioned unicorn.

I still have a lot of finished polymer clay creations I didn’t show you all too. My most recent one is the below snowman.

Bible Verse/Devotional/Prayer/Quote: I am struggling with my faith quite a bit lately, so here’s a space for me to pray. God, help me see Your presence. I’m struggling to feel Your nearness lately. Please help me realize that You are there for me even as I go through these hard times, or especially then, or… well, oh wait, that You are always there. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

The Tuesday Four (September 13, 2022)

Posted on by Astrid

Hi everyone. Just after I discovered the Wednesday HodgePodge, one of its participants alerted me to another weekly meme called the Tuesday 4. Today, because I’m bored and yet want to write, I’ll join in. This week’s questions are rather simple, yet they allow for much discussion if one so decides.

1. Are you happy with the way your life is going?
Well, it’s complicated. Right now, I’d say yes, but I’ve had to travel quite the bumpy road to get here and there’s still a lot of room for improvement. For example, I would hopefully be even happier with the way my life is going once I’m in a more suitable care home. Besides, the fact that I answer “Yes” to this question, is also dependent upon the fact that I’m in a pretty good mood.

2. Are you planning any trips in the future?
Not trips as in longer travels, but my husband and I just decided to go for a day trip to Zwolle on Sunday in honor of our eleventh wedding anniversary on Monday. Zwolle is the nearest city to where I live in the care facility. We decided to go on Sunday rather than Monday because most restaurants are closed on Mondays.

3. Are you reading anything at the moment or do you plan on reading something interesting?
I am currently reading A Family Torn Apart by Cathy Glass, a foster care memoir. I love fostering and other inspirational memoirs and have read quite a few of Cathy Glass’s other books.

4. What’s for supper tonight at your house?
I live in a care facility, as regular readers know, and we get our meals delivered to be warmed in an oven or microwave. I had potatoes, mixed veggies and a chicken sausage. I rarely choose potatoes from the meal delivery company, but apparently all other choices from the menu were even worse.

As of September 1, the company has decided to provide whole-grain pasta and brown rice instead of regular pasta or rice, something I mostly consider a good thing. The brown rice takes a little getting used to. They also upped the amount of veg in their meals from 150 to 200 grams. I hardly notice it in the pasta or rice dishes and I wonder whether they skipped those. I mean, originally they weren’t providing the whole-grain pasta or brown rice on the so-called “pasta menu”, which I usually pick from, so only the twice a month or so that the regular menu serves pasta or rice as an option was that the healthy alternative. Thankfully, enough people were complaining that the healthier food was not really happening so that they did change it across the board. I wonder whether they did the same with the increased amount of veg though. In any case, I had enough veg in my meal today.

Reading Wrap-Up (August 22, 2022) #IMWAYR

Posted on by Astrid

Hi everyone. I’ve been doing a lot of reading over the past week, so I thought I’d share a reading wrap-up once again. As usual, I’m joining It’s Monday! What Are You Reading? (#IMWAYR). Here goes.

What I’m Currently Reading

After I finished my last book on Saturday, I was thinking of starting a memoir. After looking through Bookshare’s biography and memoir category for a bit and reading the summaries of several books, I finally settled on All My Friends Are Invisible by Jonathan Joly. This is a memoir about the author’s life growing up surrounded by imaginary friends. I’m pretty sure that, further yet, the author could be diagnosed with dissociative identity disorder, but so far this term hasn’t been mentioned.

Other than that, I picked up My Heart and Other Black holes by Jasmine Warga again. I’m not sure why I even want to finish it, other than to prove to myself that I can finish a book that doesn’t deserve at least a four-star rating. It’s so predictable. Maybe I’m hoping for some intriguing plot twist, but so far at 62%, no such luck.

What I Recently Finished Reading

I finished two books in the past week. One is Six Weeks to Live by Catherine McKenzie, which I reviewed on Tuesday. The other is a winter special in the Unicorn Magic series by Daisy Meadows called Snowstar and the Big Freeze. This chapter book was the perfect antidote to the hot weather. Or something like that. I honestly don’t know why I picked it in the middle of August, but I did and it was good.

What I Think I’ll Read Next

I once again have no idea. I’m a true mood reader, so whenever I finish a book, I grab whatever strikes my fancy next. That’s how I got to pick the Jonathan Joly memoir too. I mean, I literally hadn’t heard of it minutes before I started reading it. So yeah, I might read another chapter book on magical creatures, since I have several downloaded off Bookshare. However, I may also be in the mood for another thriller. Who knows? I currently don’t.

What have you been reading recently?

The Wednesday HodgePodge (August 17, 2022)

Posted on by Astrid

Hi everyone. I’m joining the Wednesday HodgePodge again. Here are Joyce’s questions.

1. August is National Back To School Month…how does that make you feel? Share a back-to-school memory.
I don’t really feel much regarding back-to-school time, as I’m not in school anymore (it’s been 17 years since I graduated high school) and my nieces are too young to be in school. I’m so glad to be out of school though.

A back-to-school memory? My first day at the school for the blind I spent fourth till sixth grade at. We went to church to mark the beginning of the school year, as it was a Christian school. I found it all very strange, having never been to a church before, since my parents are atheists. I’m pretty sure I fell asleep during the service though.

2. Something you’ve learned in “the school of life”?
People who get paid to have any sort of relationship with you, won’t stick around for you, so you have no reason to stay for them either. Yes, I’m referring to my wish to transfer to another care facility here.

3. Three words to describe your current mood.
Unquiet, determined, sad.

4. A summer food you’ve eaten too much of/are tired of? A summer food you haven’t had enough of?
There isn’t any summer food I’m really tired of, though today I turned down another ice cream cone because I’d had three in the past week already. A summer food I haven’t had enough of? Summer fruit!

5. What small stuff do you sweat that you know you shouldn’t?
I tend to get very easily frustrated, so quite a lot, but lately I’ve also tried to solve small problems more rather than just not caring. An example are air bubbles in my clay. The reason that I do try to solve the problem now, is that I know how to (to an extent) rather than just having to wait for my pieces to be cured and then deciding whether they go in the trash or are just about good enough to be displayed. It’s a tricky balancing act of trying not to sweat the small stuff but also trying not to be careless.

6. Insert your own random thought here.
Yesterday, we had daytime temperatures of 30°C. It isn’t expected to get this hot again anytime this year. My husband, not surprisingly, started the Christmas prep WhatsApp group with his family. He always does in mid-August. I, too, before we got to discuss this, started reading a winter-themed chapter book.

Book Review: Six Weeks to Live by Catherine McKenzie

Posted on by Astrid

Hi everyone. Like I said a few weeks ago, I started reading Six Weeks to Live by Catherine McKenzie. I discovered it on BookBub, then downloaded it off Bookshare. I finished the book just before midnight yesterday, so here are my thoughts.

Book Blurb

A gripping psychological suspense novel about a woman diagnosed with cancer who sets out to discover if someone poisoned her before her time is up

Jennifer Barnes never expected the shocking news she received at a routine doctor’s appointment: she has a terminal brain tumor—and only six weeks left
to live.

While stunned by the diagnosis, the forty-eight-year-old mother decides to spend what little time she has left with her family—her adult triplets and twin
grandsons—close by her side. But when she realizes she was possibly poisoned a year earlier, she’s determined to discover who might have tried to get rid
of her before she’s gone for good.

Separated from her husband and with a contentious divorce in progress, Jennifer focuses her suspicions on her soon-to-be ex. Meanwhile, her daughters are
each processing the news differently. Calm medical student Emily is there for whatever Jennifer needs. Moody scientist Aline, who keeps her mother at arm’s
length, nonetheless agrees to help with the investigation. Even imprudent Miranda, who has recently had to move back home, is being unusually solicitous.

But with her daughters doubting her campaign against their father, Jennifer can’t help but wonder if the poisoning is all in her head—or if there’s someone
else who wanted her dead.

My Review

The story is told in short chapters and from alternating viewpoints. Jennifer’s story is told in first-person perspective, while her three daughters’ viewpoints are displayed in third-person perspective. I loved both of these aspects. The short chapters allowed me to lay aside the book for a bit when I wanted to do something other than read. The alternating viewpoints allowed me to gain a nice glimpse into each character’s mind, while the fact that Jennifer’s perspective was the only first-person perspective made it clear that she’s supposed to be the center of attention.

I originally thought the book was on the predictable side for a thriller, believing I’d figured out who caused Jennifer’s poisoning by 22% and the exact nature of the ending by 57%. I was wrong. So wrong. In fact, I didn’t figure out the exact nature of the situation until the very end of the book and it’s not because of some stupid plot twist that makes no sense other than it being required to show the reader that this was a thriller after all. In fact, the story is really well-constructed. I once again had trouble letting go of it once I’d finished it. I gave it a five-star rating again even though I noticed its average rating on Goodreads is only 3.65 stars. I’m not even sure I’d give it a 4.5-star rating if I could this time around.

See more details about this book on its Goodreads page.