Share Our Life (March 2025): An Average Day

Hi everyone! Today I’m joining Share Our Life, a linky with a monthly theme. This month, it’s to describe an average day in your life. Unfortunately, taking pictures is not part of my average day. I really want to change that, but for now, just text will have to do. I didn’t pick a specific day to describe.

I usually wake up at around 7:30AM when the staff are helping the resident in the room next to me with her morning routine. Since my first support moment isn’t until 8:15AM, I usually have a little snooze.

8:15AM is when my staff come to wake me up and help me with my morning routine. I hate showering, so don’t do it each day. I get dressed and have breakfast – usually quark with muesli and blueberries. My morning routine, including breakfast, can take up to an hour.

At 9:15AM, I’ll usually lie back in bed for a little slumber while listening to music on my music pillow.

My first activity time slot starts at 10AM. I sometimes extend my lie-in until 10:15 or 10:30AM. I start my activity time slot with coffee and then I’ll usually either play a card or dice game or go for a walk.

By 11:30AM, my staff leave to prepare my lunch. I usually eat two slices of bread with peanut butter and a cracker with speculoos (Biscoff). I also consume a serving of veg with my lunch. My lunchtime is at noon.

By 12:15PM, I’m done eating and will be on my phone for a bit, reading the news or texting or calling my spouse, who is then usually taking a break.

My two-hour activity time slot starts at 12:45PM. This time slot was originally intended for more time-consuming activities such as a bigger polymer clay project, going out to the nearby town, etc. Occasionally, I’ll use this time slot for cooking dinner for myself and my fellow residents. Often though, I can be found walking grounds with my staff. I’ll end my activity time slot with coffee, although I might also have a cuppa by 1:45PM already.

My staff go into handover at 2:45PM and I’ll most days use up the 45 minutes until my next supported moment with some online activities. By the way, handover doesn’t take 45 minutes, but it’s not like I need one-on-one all of the time.

During my 3:30PM activity time slot, which lasts an hour, I commonly play a dice game. I sometimes also go for another walk. I have unsupported time again for 30 minutes after this while my staff help the other clients with their dinner. My dinner is at 5PM. I am a rather fast eater, so am frequently finished by 5:15PM. My staff have their break at 5:30PM.

At 6PM, my final activity moment for the day starts. I have an activity list, from which I can choose what we’re going to do. What we’ll do, is too often related to the staff supporting me. I really want to change this, but it’s hard.

I’ll have my final coffee at 7PM and then have unsupported time again until it’s time for my late evening meds at 8PM. I’ll most commonly use this time and the rest of the evening for blog-related activities.

Like I’ve shared many times, I usually have Dubbelfrisss in apple-peach flavor with my evening meds. I also will eat a serving of fruit. Then I’ll be told which staff will be in the home the next day. Some days, I’ll hang out in the living room for some time then, while at other times, like today, I’ll head straight back to my room and go online. I used to be phoning my spouse a lot late in the evening too, but now we’ll often talk at other times.

At 8:45PM, I’ll sometimes have a little snack. Then I’ll go online again until my staff come to supervise me brushing my teeth and to close my door to the yard at 9:30PM. After that, the staff will leave the home and I’m supposed to rely on the night staff in the main institution building for support. My fellow residents all go to bed before then, but I’m allowed to stay up. I’m a true night owl, so most days it’ll have been past 11PM before I’m in bed.

All this sounds incredibly boring and unproductive. I really want to put my unsupported time to better use, because currently most of the time I just end up scrolling.

#WeekendCoffeeShare (March 8, 2025)

Hi everyone on this International Women’s Day! I’m joining #WeekendCoffeeShare. It’s 7:30PM, so no more coffee for me. If you’d like a drink though, feel free to grab one and let’s chat.

If we were having coffee, first I’d talk about the weather. For most of the week, it’s been absolutely gorgeous! Today, we even reached 20°C. I know that this isn’t good news, in the sense that it’s way too warm for early March. I do care, but I also realize that I alone (or even all of the Netherlands alone) can’t stop or slow down climate change. For this reason, I’m enjoying the good weather while I can.

If we were having coffee, then I’d brag about all the physical activity I got in. Yesterday, I set a new record on my exercise minutes by exercising (mostly walking) for over three hours. I burned 600 active calories according to my Apple Watch.

Today, I didn’t walk as much, but still went for a few nice walks and I did ride the side-by-side bike. It’s an eBike and my staff had forgotten to check its battery level, so it quit working midway through our ride.

If we were having coffee, then I’d tell you that, on Thursday, my staff and I took a walk around the nearby lake. We also walked this route one day in late January and I remembered a little café along the way had the most delicious caramel pie. My partner looked at the menu on Wednesday and said the caramel pie wasn’t on it. Maybe it was the “pie of the week”. Thankfully, once at the café, my staff asked the waitress whether they still had the caramel pie and they did!

If we were having coffee, I’d tell you I am planning to create a trinket dish out of polymer clay soon. I ordered a cutter for it, which arrived on Monday. Unfortunately, my ceramic tile that I work on, is too small to cut out the shape on. However, one of my staff said she still had ceramic tiles somewhere and, thankfully, these were big enough. Haven’t gotten down to actually creating the trinket dish yet, because the weather’s just too beautiful.

If we were having coffee, I’d also share that, on Tuesday, a staff and I went for a walk around grounds again with the purpose of taking pictures of nature. There were mostly snowdrops and crocuses to be seen.



A few days later though, they’d mostly gone and the first daffodils could be spotted. No pics of those, as it was too sunny when I was out today.

If we were having coffee, I would conclude by saying this week overall was good. I had a few moments when I was in distress over the fact that there were quite a few temp workers, but the staff made sure always to assign me a regular staff. I realize it can’t always be this way and I’m okay with that, but I did tell my staff that my accepting a temp worker once out of necessity doesn’t make them a regular.

Poem: Always Eager

A very hungry caterpillar,
Never enough, always too much
I consume…

Insatiable I feel,
Always eager
For more…

Will I ever be content?
Feeel that my needs are met?
Or will I never…

Wrap myself in a cocoon,
And wait
Patiently…

For myself
To emerge
A beautiful butterfly…


This poem was written for dVerse’s Poetics, for which the prompt is “cycles of life”. I often use the metaphor of the very hungry caterpillar as a way to describe my perpetual criticism of the care system. In reality though, I think that, when my needs are met, I could evolve like a caterpillar transforming into a beautiful butterfly. Or maybe I’d turn into a moth, who knows?

Share Your World (March 3, 2025)

Hi everyone. Today, I’m joining in with Share Your World. I love the gratitude section at the bottom of Di’s original post. In fact, I may use it as a jumping point for another post later. For now though, let’s move on to Di’s questions.

1. Which of the following could you NOT do without?
Automatic washing machine, TV/cable, Microwave oven.
I don’t need any of these just for myself and don’t personally use any, although we have all three in the home. If I had to choose which of these to keep in my care home, it’d be the automatic washing machine. Not because I have to do my own laundry, but because the staff are busy enough with it now that they don’t have to do it by hand.

Life without a TV would be so relaxing, as the TV is blaring all day long in the living room that’s adjacent to my room and with the TV directly attached to the shared wall.

2. Which would be your priority of these:
a warm coat or a comfortable pair of shoes.
Comfortable pair of shoes. Simply because, without the right shoes, I just can’t be outside because it’d mean constantly falling.

3. Would you rather have a hot cup of tea/coffee or hot soup?
Hot coffee all the way! I don’t like the feel of soup in my mouth.

4. If you had the choice rather than necessity/cost effectiveness, would you rather rent a property, buy with a mortgage, or share with family/friends and split the cost?
I have no idea. My spouse and I currently own a house (with a mortgage) and it’s stressful with all that we have to do by ourselves (that is, just my spouse) in terms of renovations.

Then again, our rented house was stressful because we were dependent on the housing corporation. In fact, I’ve had more stressful situations with them than I’d like to share.

Sharing with family/friends would also be quite stressful though, as I can’t get along with my parents or sister.

Let’s just end this by saying I’d stay where I am.

Today’s Small Joys (March 2, 2025)

Hi everyone. I’m struggling intensely today. I often say that these days are the best for gratitude lists, but I don’t feel capable of doing an entire ten things of thankful. Instead, I’m going to list some small pleasures from today. I’m joining Sunny Sunday.

1. Coffee. My staff brought me an extra cup of coffee when waking me up.

2. Crunchy muesli. I treated myself today.

3. Earning some top commenter achievements on Reddit. Don’t ask me how.

4. Beautiful weather: it was quite sunny and mild with a daytime high of 10°C.

5. A delicious burger at McDonald’s.

6. A hug from my spouse. In fact, the entire visit was good. Having my spouse on my side genuinely helps.

This was easier than I thought. In fact, the E-mail newsletter I got this idea from, suggested listing only one to three things and I made it to six.

#WeekendCoffeeShare (March 1, 2025)

Hi everyone on this first day of March. I’m joining #WeekendCoffeeShare again. I’ve just had my last cup of coffee for the day, but if you’re quick, you may be able to enjoy a soft drink. We usually get chips with our soft drinks on weekends, but if I’m correct, the staff ordered meatballs. Let’s have a drink (and a snack) and let’s catch up.

If we were having coffee, first I’d talk about the weather. Most days, it was chilly but not rainy. We got the most rain on Thursday, but even then I managed to go out.

If we were having coffee, then I’d tell you that I did achieve the perfect month on my Apple Watch in February. My March challenge is incredibly easy: get in at least 3.63km of walking/running on at least fourteen days this month. I always thought the challenges were based on the previous month’s achievements, but I’m pretty sure I got a lot more steps in during February.

If we were having coffee, I’d report that I’ve been struggling again. This led to a number of arguments between me and the staff. Particularly, it frustrates me to no end that some staff are much more likely to react angrily to my irritability than others. As a result, I don’t accept gestures indicating they support me from these staff. Like, if you’ve first been telling me off, I won’t accept it when you offer me comfort. Unfortunately, my assigned staff claims this differing treatment is just how it is and she says it’s because I don’t accept the same treatment from everyone. This came across as if she was holding me responsible for the different approaches.

If we were having coffee, I’d also share that I’ve been frustrated with my day schedule and particularly the lack of clarity in it. I particularly don’t like the fact that, each time, I’ll have to choose an activity out of fifteen or so options. Thankfully, I was able to turn my frustration around today and decide that, on Monday, I’m going to the next town to buy groceries and, on Tuesday, I’m going to cook dinner for the home.

If we were having coffee, I’d share that part of my struggle is the extreme discrepancy between my intelligence and my emotional functioning. I’m said to function emotionally at a level comparable to a child under 18 months of age in most respects, but my IQ is above-average. Moreover, I happen to have an interest in psychology and social work. As a result, I, for example, know more about the theory of care and support than most of my staff, but I can’t apply it to my own situation and not just because I’m the client.

Like, when I’m in a good place mentally, I sometimes find myself pointing out ways staff are asking too much of me emotionally, but precisely because I can say so, I’m judged not to need the support I need.

If we were having coffee, I would however also share that I still experience moments of joy. For example, on Monday, a new student staff was being introduced to my activities and we created a unicorn (of course) out of polymer clay. This time, because the unicorn was rather fat and the staff had placed the front legs far apart, I chose to add a heart to its belly. I also decorated its back with rhinestones. Two pictures below, because my staff couldn’t capture both the heart and the rhinestones in one.


If we were having coffee, lastly I’d tell you that I struggle with self-criticism and this also leads me towards less creativity. I, however, overcame the feeling that I “should be better” sometime on Tuesday when I created a rather simple bracelet. It was just beads stringed onto elastic wire. However, looking at my comment about emotional development, I sincerely believe I did a pretty awesome job, since a toddler can’t do this at all.

Sorry for the rambly post. I’m still feeling hazy after another meltdown. By the way, no meatballs for our evening treat, as somehow they’d disappeared.