Book Review: Abby, Tried and True by Donna Gephart

Posted on by Astrid

About a week ago, I was browsing the children’s book category on Bookshare and I came across the realistic middle grade novel Abby, Tried and True by Donna Gephart. Gephart was a new to me author even though she’s had eight middle grade novels published so far.

I was already reading four different books at the same time, but needed something, uhm, lighter? Not that the subject matter of this book is light, but I did expect it to be more easy to read than the adult novels I was reading. I raced through the first 80% of this book, then let it sit there because the #AtoZChallenge got in the way. I eventually decided to finish the book last night. Let me share my thoughts.

Summary

When Abby Braverman’s best friend, Cat, moves to Israel, she’s sure it’s the worst thing that could happen. But then her older brother, Paul, is diagnosed with cancer, and life upends again. Now it’s up to Abby to find a way to navigate seventh grade without her best friend, help keep her brother’s spirits up during difficult treatments, and figure out her surprising new feelings for the boy next door.

My Review

First, let me share that this book is really good with respect to its representation of diverse characters. Abby and her family are Jewish, which in a way shouldn’t be surprising, but it was to me. Abby has two Moms and nowhere is there a mention of a biological father. Abby just corrects people who assume she must have a Mom and a Dad.

Second, Abby is a truly great character. At first, she seems a bit dorky, but her sense of humor is apparent pretty quickly. I really loved the word jokes in this book. One of them, about Mom Rachel’s cooking YouTube, I didn’t even get until I’d finished the book.

Despite the tough subject matter of Paul’s cancer, this is a really lighthearted read. I don’t mean that the hard parts are sugarcoated – they aren’t. I mean, Paul truly experiences grief and sadness and this is made very clear. However, through Abby’s strength, I keep feeling that everything will be okay in the end.

The side characters are also very well-developed. I totally rooted for Conrad, the boy next door Abby has feelings for. However, there are also more negative characters out there. That makes this story believable and yet positive at the same time.

Overall, I loved this story. I gave it a solid five stars on Goodreads.

Book Details

Title: Abby, Tried and True
Author: Donna Gephart
Publisher: Simon & Schuster Books for Young Readers
Publication Date: March 9, 2021

Outdoor Activities I Enjoy

Posted on by Astrid

The book 412 Journaling Exercises and Prompts for Personal Growth by Meredith Lane contains, in addition to a wealth of assorted journaling prompts, also a number of “list of twenty” prompts. One of these is outdoor activities you enjoy. Right now, the weather outside is frightful: cloudy, windy, rainy and even a bit snowy. It’s April though and the weather has to get better someday soon. For when it does, let me share some of my favorite outdoor activities.

1. Walking. This is a no-brainer to anyone who’s read some of my blog before. I love love love walking and will even go for some walks in light rain occasionally.

2. Sunbathing. Or rather, just sitting in the sun. I don’t really sunbathe that much, but I do love to sit in the sunshine sometimes.

3. Swinging. At the day center, there is a rocking lounger outside of the door of my pre-lockdown group. I’ve also heard there are sets of swings in front of some of the other homes. At my former day centers, I loved to sit on a swing outside and swing about.

4. Listening to birdsong. I really love to hear the birds sing and chirp when I’m walking or sitting outside. I have absolutely no birdsong recognition skill whatsoever, but the mere sound of the different birds is pure bliss.

5. Meeting people from other care homes. This is mostly due to lockdown, as I used to be able to speak to other clients at the day center. Now we have to meet outside. I love talking to my acquaintances from other homes.

6. Swimming. Mostly in the outdoor pool, that is. Oh, how I wish I would be allowed into them again. I’ve heard some outdoor swimming pools have opened to a limited number of swimmers, but then still I won’t be able to go yet. I don’t really like swimming in a lake as much.

7. Barbecueing. Oh, how I love all the barbecue meat. Truly, if you ask me, salads are just a necessary evil. No, not really, but I am a true carnivore when it comes to barbecueing.

8. Enjoying a picnic. Although I struggle not to make a mess when not seated at a table. I try to think that’s not a problem though.

9. Feeling the wind blow through my hair. I don’t really like windy weather like today, but I do love to feel a slight breeze on my face and through my hair.

10. Campfires. Mostly for the marshmallows, that is. I don’t particularly care for the smoky scent and feel of a campfire, but it definitely adds to a cozy atmosphere.

Okay, I’m not going to get to twenty, but this was definitely fun to try.

What are your favorite outdoor activities?

loopyloulaura

Also linking up with #SeniSal.

Diffusing Essential Oils #AtoZChallenge

Posted on by Astrid

Welcome to my letter D post in the #AtoZChallenge. My theme for this challenge is aromatherapy and today, I’ll talk about one of the most common ways of using essential oils: diffusing.

When I first started using essential oils, oil lamps were still popular. These use a tealight under the essential oil bowl. Other options were aroma stones, which you were supposed to lay on the heating. However, heat can alter the effects of the essential oil and is, for this reason, not recommended.

When I first got my own essential oil diffuser, it was a nebulizer that works with a fan. Then, about a year and a half ago, I got an ultrasonic diffuser. This is a diffuser in which you add water and essential oils. Ultrasonic waves then convert the water and oil into a fine mist. There are advantages and disadvantages to both types of diffusers:


  • Fan-based nebulizers are more expensive than ultrasonic diffusers.
  • They also are usually louder. My nebulizer’s fan made a horrible noise, while the only sound my ultrasonic diffuser makes, is a slight bubbling of the water.

  • You don’t need to clean fan-based nebulizers. Rather, you remove the oil filter or switch off the bottle of oil. My nebulizer had oil filters, but I’ve heard there are also diffusers to which you attach a bottle of essential oil directly. Ultrasonic diffusers need to be cleaned occasionally. I heard various things about how to clean a diffuser. I personally fill about half the diffuser’s container with water and then add a bit of white vinegar. Then I turn on the diffuser for five to ten minutes. I finally have it on with just water to clear out the vinegar smell.


I, to be honest, prefer my ultrasonic diffuser because it’s quieter than the fan.

There are many brands of diffusers. Some ultrasonic diffusers are as cheap as €15. Mine cost about €40. My AromaStream® fan-based nebulizer cost about €60.

Ultrasonic diffusers also come in various sizes. Mine has a container of at most 300ml water, which is enough to diffuse essential oils into a large bedroom or normal living room. The diffuser size determines how many drops of essential oil you can use in it. With a 300ml diffuser like mine, 10-12 drops is recommended.

Many essential oil diffusers have other uses besides diffusing essential oil. For example, mine has LED lights in it too, so it doubles as a night light. I’ve also heard of an essential oil diffuser with a Bluetooth speaker in it. I think that’s awesome!

#WeekendCoffeeShare (April 4, 2021)

Posted on by Astrid

Hi everyone on this chilly and cloudy Easter Sunday. I am rather late joining in with #WeekendCoffeeShare. The reason is that I’m participating in the #AtoZChallenge too and couldn’t find the time to publish another post until today. I just had my afternoon coffee and am going to have a soft drink in a bit, so if you’d like something to drink, that’d be great. Let’s grab a drink and let’s catch up.

If we were having coffee, I’d share how much fun I’m having with the #AtoZChallenge. It is a great way of connecting with new bloggers and challenging myself to write (almost) everyday. For those who don’t know, the challenge is to write posts using each letter of the alphabet on each day of April except Sundays. This is the reason I have time to write a blog post today. My theme is aromatherapy and natural wellness.

If we were having coffee, I would share that this week was rather eventful in general. On Monday, I was very much triggered. I have been having emotional flashbacks a lot, as well as paranoid thoughts about my former clinician reporting me for care fraud if she finds out I’m in long-term care. My staff try to reassure me that I’m not responsible for my care funding. After all, my staff, the manager and behavior specialist applied for me. I am still unsure though.

Anyway, on Monday, when I was particularly triggered, I did an exercise of hitting a pillow to symbolically kick my former clinician out of my life. It was truly empowering!

If we were having coffee, I would also share that, on Friday, I had a treatment review at the mental health agency. My nurse practitioner tried to tell me that I’m already actually processing my trauma with the steps I’m taking now, such as the exercise on Monday. This validated me. My community psychiatric nurse, however, wasn’t fully sure of her role in my treatment and wondered whether she could visit me less frequently. For now, we have decided against this in order to maintain weekly appointments with mental health, alternatingly with my nurse practitioner and CPN.

If we were having coffee, I’d tell you that I finally managed to go to Lobith over the weekend. My cold is still not fully gone, but it’s gone enough that I could see my husband. We had delicious Airfryer fries, turkey and peas for dinner yesterday, as well as pudding for dessert. This morning, we had breakfast in front of the television while watching Hour of Power. It was great!

How has your week been? And how’s your Easter weekend?

Carrier Oils in Aromatherapy #AtoZChallenge

Posted on by Astrid

Welcome to the letter C post in my #AtoZChallenge on aromatherapy. Today, I will be discussing carrier oils.

Carrier oils, also sometimes called base oils, are the oils used to dilute essential oils into when using essential oils in skincare products. After all, undiluted essential oils are irritating to the skin. Please note the following differences between essential oils and carrier oils:


  1. Essential oils are derived from the aromatic components of the plant, such as leaves, bark and root. Carrier oils come from the fatty portions of the plant, such as the seeds.

  2. Essential oils retain the characteristic odor of the plant. Carrier oils do not, at least not very strongly.

  3. Essential oils evaporate easily (hence producing their characteristic scent). Carrier oils do not evaporate as easily.

  4. Carrier oils can go rancid over time. Essential oils do not, but they will oxidize and lose their therapeutic benefits.

Carrier oils are natural vegetable oils derived from the fatty portions of plants, usually the seeds, kernels or nuts. The name “carrier oil” comes from their function in carrying the essential oils onto the skin. Aloe vera gel can also be used as a carrier, but it isn’t an oil. I will be focusing on oils here. Below are some examples of carrier oils.

1. Sweet almond oil. One of the most commonly-used carrier oils, because it is widely available in organic form. It is relatively affordable, all-purpose and has a shelf life of 1-2 years.

2. Grape seed oil. A relatively all-purpose oil in skincare or massage. However, it is not often available in pure, organic form. It also has a rather short shelf life of only 6-12 months.

3. Coconut oil. This comes either in a virgin form or as a fractionated oil, which means it has been distilled to contain only the medium chain triglycerides. Fractionated coconut oil is odorless and highly stable. Virgin coconut oil still contains the aroma of coconuts and can, as a result, be used to create this scent.

4. Apricot kernel oil. This is an oil that is in many ways similar to sweet almond oil. However, it is lighter in texture and viscosity and is absorbed into the skin relatively quickly.

I have so far only used sweet almond and apricot kernel oils.

In addition to carrier oils, butters can also be used in skincare products, such as body butter or lip balm. Butters include mango butter, cocoa butter and sometimes coconut oil can be thick enough to be used as a butter. I love to combine cocoa butter, coconut oil and sweet almond oil into a body butter.

Blending: Essential Oils in Synergy #AtoZChallenge

Posted on by Astrid

Welcome to the letter B post in my #AtoZChallenge, in which I discuss aromatherapy and natural healing. Today, I will discuss the principles of aromatherapeutic blending.

Most people who know a bit about essential oils, will know that they often aren’t used singly, but rather in combination. That is, when I first bought essential oils, I used single oils only, because I was clueless about blending. Besides, being blind, I found it hard to count the number of drops I put in my diffuser, so I would just give the bottle a shake and hope something came out.

Now, I rarely if ever use single oils in my diffuser or in my homemade skincare products. However, you may be wondering, why not? What is the advantage of using essential oils in combination?

The simple answer might be that, just as with perfume, combinations of essential oils smell better (when done correctly) than the single scent. However, experience also shows that one oil can complement or strengthen another’s therapeutic benefits. This is called synergy.

According to Jennifer Peace Rhind, the author of Aromatherapeutic Blending: Essential Oils in Synergy, the first known example of synergistic blending of plant components dates back to ancient Egypt, around 1500 BC. The Egyptians used combinations of myrrh and frankincense. So did traditional Chinese healers when treating blood stagnation and inflammation.

Indeed, the author says, synergistic effectiveness of different essential oils has been proven in the lab, at least in some contexts. She said that a combination of frankincense and myrrh was shown to have significantly better antimicrobial properties than either alone.

Similarly, ayurvedic medicine uses combinations of herbs in its traditional treatment of illnesses. Jennifer Peace Rhind says that, indeed, the combination of for example ginger and long pepper has shown to have synergistic benefits. This might be because compounds in one prevent breakdown and enhance absorption of the other.

The first person to describe the effects of aromatic essences on anxiety and depression was Paolo Rovesti in the 1970s. He, however, also noted that combinations of oils work better than one oil on its own.

One of the reasons for this could be that single essential oils when not diluted often have a very strong odor. This may be experienced as unpleasant. When combined, though, essential oils’ odor may be more pleasant. If nothing else, essential oil blends are more pleasing to the senses than single oils and, as a result, contribute to mental wellbeing. After all, no-one is going to feel better when smelling an odor they don’t like!

So is there any evidence for synergy? Well, insofar as there is evidence for aromatherapy, that is. It seems there is, if for no other reason, then because essential oils are themselves a mixture of compounds. Peace Rhind cites a study in which various components of lavender essential oils were proven to work together against anxiety in animals.

Interestingly, essential oil blending is much more complex than the simple idea that certain oils promote one another’s effects. After all, Peace Rhind says, certain oils work together (synergy) at certain doses but work against each other (antagonism) at other doses. The author explains a way of plotting the effectiveness of essential oil blends in a graph. I won’t get into this though, as I barely understand it myself.

Aromatherapy: An Introduction #AtoZChallenge

Posted on by Astrid

Welcome to day one in the #AtoZChallenge, in which I talk about aromatherapy and essential oils. Today, I’ll share a brief introduction to what aromatherapy is. In future posts, I’ll go deeper into the different uses of aromatherapy and essential oils.

Aromatherapy is a form of complementary or alternative medicine in which essential oils and other plant compounds are used in the promotion of health and wellness. Essential oils are natural oils typically extracted by distillation and having the characteristic odor of the plant. They are therefore also known as aromatic oils. They are, for clarity’s sake, not the same as fragrance or perfume oils. Though perfume oils are also often created from partly natural ingredients, they don’t offer the therapeutic benefits of essential oils.

Aromatherapy has probably been practisedforever. Hippocrates, the “father of modern medicine”, promoted it some 2,500 years ago.

However, according to the National Association for Holistic Aromatherapy (NAHA), the term “aromatherapy” (or “aromathérapie” in French) wasn’t introduced till 1937. It was first used by the French chemist René-Maurice Gattefossé. According to the NAHA, Gattefossé is most well-known (within the field of aromatherapy, I suppose) for an incident in which he burned his hand and then put it in a vat of lavender, which prevented the otherwise inevitible scarring.

Essential oils are the most commonly used component of a plant in aromatherapy. However, aromatherapists also use carrier oils (which are used to dilute essential oils), hydrosols (or floral waters) and other parts of the plant. I will get to these later in this series.

In this series, I will also be discussing the various essential oils I know about. Please note that not all essential oils are equal. Quality may be an issue, which I’ll get to later. However, as the author of AromaWeb says, there are many different oils grouped together that may come from different plants. For example, both eucalyptus globulus and eucalyptus radiata are often referred to as “eucalyptus”. Same for Atlas cedarwood and Virginia cedarwood, which are actually very different plants. In this series, I will group together various oils that have related properties and constituents. After all, if I were to describe each oil individually, I could have half a dozen A to Z Challenges filled up.

A Wonderful Wednesday

Posted on by Astrid

Hi everyone. This is going to be a quick post. I am really pleased with myself right now. Today is a great day. The sun shone, the birds sang and I broke my daily step record!

In the morning, my day activities staff took me to the marketplace. We got fried fish for lunch. We also wanted to get fried chicken, but the poultry guy didn’t have that today. I also got cookie crumbs (yes, they’re a real thing). They were €2 a bag but two bags for €3, so I treated myself and got two bags. One of them, I already consumed. Then we walked to the supermarket to see if they had fried chicken and they did!

I also went on a walk before going to the marketplace. We went there by car and I didn’t look at my Fitbit until we were back. I wasn’t expecting to have gotten in many steps, but already had nearly 5,000 steps.

Then in the afternoon, my mother-in-law visited me. We went on over an hour’s walk together. The sun was shining brightly and it was really warm, about 24°C. I truly loved the birdsong, the ability to walk and the sunshine!

In the evening, I went on two more walks with my one-on-one. I got in over 19,000 steps, so just yet, I did a little dance just to get to 20,000 steps. That’s double my daily step goal. I broke my daily step record, which was at just over 17,000 on December 18, 2020.

I also got in 173 active heartrate zone minutes. I wasn’t really exercising for nearly three hours today, but the minutes I got in the cardio zone, count twice.

I did worry a little about my heartrate not returning to normal nearly as fast as my mother-in-law’s. Then again, she is of average build, while I am, as much as I hate to admit it, still obese. I’m trying not to worry too much, since my resting heartrate is still within the normal range.

Overall, today was a wonderful day! Unfortunately, the temperature is supposed to drop to a high of like 13°C tomorrow. It’s not supposed to rain though, so I can still walk. That is, if my muscles don’t ache all over.

Things That Made Me Smile (March 29, 2021) #WeeklySmile

Posted on by Astrid

Hello everyone. I’m still struggling quite a bit today. Like I said yesterday, I have been flooded with emotional flashbacks. To end my day on a positive note, though, I am participating in The Weekly Smile once again. Today, my smiles are food-related.

On Friday, one of the staff came to me to say that she was going to cook a meal for that evening with one of my fellow clients. He and I are the only ones who can eat solid food. Well, that isn’t 100% true, but the other client who can, is a very picky eater, who doesn’t enjoy the types of meals we do. Anyway, the staff gave me the choice between three different dishes we could make with Knorr’s World Dishes series of packages. These are packets of rice, pasta or the like, seasoning and spices, to which you add veggies and meat. The meals I could choose from, were köfta (a Greek meatball dish), nacho casserole and lasagne. I chose the nacho casserole.

The staff and this other client set about preparing the casserole in the afternoon. At around 4:30PM, the evening staff put it in the oven. It was so delicious! The casserole contained nacho chips, minced meat, onions and bell peppers. There was also lettuce to go with it as a side dish, but I didn’t have that.

These packages are for two to three people, so I had more than enough. I have fond memories of cooking köfta myself when in independence training in 2007 and would really like to help prepare it when we get to this one.

Then yesterday, my one-on-one support staff had brought ready-made cookie dough. We made cookies with this and they tasted awesome! Yesterday evening, I had two. I then had the staff take the cookies to the living room to give to her colleagues or any clients who may be able to enjoy them. I fully expected them to be all gone by today, but there were still some left! That definitely put a smile to my face.

What made you smile lately?

Angry and Dissatisfied

Posted on by Astrid

Today, I feel flooded with emotional flashbacks that I’m not 100% sure about what triggered them or even what they are about. To give myself some insight, I picked up the book Journal Writing Prompts for Child Abuse Survivors again. Somehow, the prompts about anger appealed to me.

Growing up, I was always described as “too quick to anger”. There is some truth to this, in that I have and always had an extremely low level of distress tolerance.

My parents would react to this with resentment, but they’d generally solve my problems anyway. This at one point was described as having low expectations of me. When the psychologist who did my latest autism assessment, said that, I was triggered. After all, if my parents had expected me to be able to work stuff out myself, would that have been any better? I understand all about letting babies “cry it out” and I’m not a fan of it. I don’t have a clue whether I was left to “cry it out” a lot. I think so, as I was in the hospital for the first three months of my life and I don’t expect the nurses to have attended to each baby’s every cry. As such, even if my parents did attend to my every cry for attention, I must’ve been allowed to learn some self-regulation through “crying it out”.

My parents weren’t the most patient people in the world. At one point, my father explained to me that a family is like a business, in that it has to be run efficiently. As such, I can understand why my parents rarely let me work stuff out on my own. I also understand why they resented helping me.

Growing up though, my poor distress tolerance skills were seen as mere anger and oppositionality. I’m not sure why people perceived me as always angry. They weren’t just my parents, after all. Maybe I am quick to anger. I don’t know, but to be honest I think distress is different from anger.

When I became an adult and was admitted to the psych hospital, my nursing diagnosis at least off the record was “angry and dissatisfied”. Again, I’m pretty sure the staff confused distress with dissatisfaction. Distress is an inability to cope. Dissatisfaction is an unwillingness to accept the situation. I was perfectly willing to be discharged back into independent living if that was what was deemed necessary, but I didn’t promise I’d cope. This was considered blackmail.

Now that I’m in long-term care, my staff no longer see me as angry or dissatisfied a lot. Even so, I haven’t changed much. I still swear and scream when my computer or iPhone won’t cooperate. Staff do help me now, but they don’t resent it anymore. This has also allowed me to practise asking for help in more productive, proactive ways, which, in turn, helps me become frustrated less easily. I like it that way.