Welcome to day eight in #Write31Days. Today’s post, like last week Monday’s, is yet again focused on emotions. I took another prompt from The Self-Exploration Journal. It asks what emotions drive me to bad habits.
I have a few self-destructive habits, some of which I engage more regularly in than others. For example, I overeat on average at least once a week, but only self-injure by cutting occasionally. Then there are these little habits that I engage in so often that I barely even notice them anymore, such as nail-biting or most recently teeth-grinding. Just a few minutes ago, my husband asked me to stop grinding my teeth.
Basically, I can be pretty sure that the type of emotional state that drives me to engage in all of these bad habits is stress. Stress is usually thought of as a type of anxiety, but it is not necessarily fear that drives it.
I tend mostly to engage in the little bad habits, like nail-biting or teeth-grinding, when not feeling much of a clear emotion at all. Rather, I tend to be in a state of worry, thinking in circles.
When emotions do reach the point where I notice them, they are pretty close to boiling point already. When this happens I may engage in self-harm behaviors or overeat.
When I look closely at what emotion causes me to engage in these self-destructive behaviors, I see that it is usually a sense of loneliness. Loneliness is not an emotion or so I’m told. At least it isn’t a primary emotion. Sadness is and that’s often what’s underneath this sense of loneliness.
Anger can also drive me to engage in self-destructive habits. Usually though, I am angry at something too minor to matter. The emotion underlying this anger is once again sadness.
What emotions drive you to bad habits?
One thought on “What Emotions Drive Me to Bad Habits? #Write31Days”
When I’m stressed I engage in a lot of little bad habits like nail bitting or picking, or bitting my lip and such. An emotion that drives me to bigger things is usually anger, when I feel a lot of it I self-injure, or at least feel like doing so. Sometimes it happens to me that I experience overloads of emotions, my explanation of it is that I’ve been suppressing them a lot of the time, particularly those negative ones, and there are times when they come to the surface, sometimes quite out of the blue, and then I also feel very self-destructive and suicidal. But I think that for me anger is the emotion that’s linked to the most of bad habits.
LikeLiked by 1 person