Chasing Perfection? #SoCS

Whenever I think of how bad I feel about my current care home situation, I am reminded of two seemingly contradictory statements from my staff. One is that I think every place is horrible anyway. The other is that I had “gold in my hands” at my old home. These seem contradictory, but really aren’t. They are two sides of the same coin: I am thought of as chasing perfection.

There may be some truth to this idea indeed, but that doesn’t negate the fact that one can learn and this place is definitely bad. It isn’t like I just need to accept what I have now just because I can’t have it all. Besides, if people – the powers-that-be, such as the behavior specialists – just had been honest with me about the fact that, indeed, to live with people of higher IQ would mean more expectations and less support, I’d have declined to move. That was, after all, the comment I put at the bottom of my “housing profile”.

And it isn’t like I chase perfection everywhere. Or honestly that I thought, at the end of the day, that this place would be perfect. Yes, when I read the home’s profile on the website, I thought it’d be, but that leaflet is either outdated or simply incorrect. But when the behavior specialist for my old home explained some things about the home, I did realize it wasn’t perfect. Same when I visited here twice. But then again, perfection doesn’t exist. And I was willing to make some sacrifices to live on institution grounds and have fellow residents I could chat with. But not everything I had: all the daily structure, all the useful day activities, all the proper help with ADLs and, interestingly, behavioral regulation too. Because, despite the fact that this home is an intensive support home, which means the residents have significant challenging behavior, whereas my old home was a care-based home, I see more people managing huge wildfires of escalating behavior without realizing the proverbial cigarettes they’ve thrown onto the ground themself.


This post was inspired by today’s prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday: “perfection”. I am sorry for being repetitive yet again. This whole care home situation is getting old, but I wish that meant I’d actually adjusted to it. I’m not sure I ever will.

8 thoughts on “Chasing Perfection? #SoCS

    1. I hope so. However, in order to make this happen, I need the help of my current support coordinator and behavior specialist and they’re not replying to my mother-in-law’s E-mails about it. I could get an independent client supporter from an advocacy organization to help me find a home outside of this care agency, but that’d take much longer and I’d probably lose my one-on-one in that case.

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  1. I’m so sorry you are still have trouble with your new care home. I don’t think you are chasing perfection, I think you are chasing safety, care and comfort which are necessities. I hope things get better for you x

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    1. Thanks for your supportive comment. With my chasing perfection, I think the staff mean the fact that I wanted to leave my old care home despite it being relatively suitable (at least compared to this one). However, even if that were the case, it doesn’t mean I’m chasing perfection now by wanting to leave my current home.

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