Not the End

My mind is exploding with chaos. So many thoughts, feelings, wishes, voices, dreams and visions float through it. It is so overloaded I am tempted to give up. Through the chaos, I can hear the monster speak. “Give in,” it lures, “go to the clouds.” I can almost picture the heavenly realm, the place the monster is trying to get me to go to, in my mind’s eye. I cry out: “No!” I am bombarded yet I stand. I won’t give up. This is not the end.


This piece was written for yesterday’s Prosery. The idea of this challenge is to use a given line of poetry in a piece of prose. The line we were asked to use is: “I am bombarded yet I stand.”

In the above piece, I try to capture what it is like to be overloaded with depressive and suicidal thoughts. Yet, I also aim to make it clear that I am fighting back. After all, this is not the end.

28 thoughts on “Not the End

    1. Oh, I’m so sorry you feel this way every month. I’m assuming you have PMDD, which thankfully I don’t experience (as far as I know, I’m on depot birth control so no noticeable cycle). My depression does seem to come in waves though. November is a particularly hard month for me.

      Liked by 1 person

        1. Oh, SAD sounds hard too. I suffer with recurrent major depression as well as emotion regulation difficulties (ie. borderline personality disorder), both of which can cause suicidal ideation. I really hope you’ve found a way to cope.

          Liked by 1 person

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