Last year, when I was first feeling like I was falling apart at my current care home, I wrote a list of my “needs” and E-mailed it to my assigned staff and support coordinator. I heavily watered down my wishes, thinking a need isn’t the same as a want and whatever comes out of a discussion of my needs, should be working for everybody involved, not just me. For example, I asked for more clarity on what activities I’d be doing each day and offered to use my whiteboard, but also said staff could just ask me what I thought I’d be doing and help me find a suitable activity; this last one was then put into my day schedule, ie. “Staff upon leaving asks Astrid what she’s going to do next”. Needless to say, this didn’t work for me, being autistic, at all, as it leaves the same amount of unstructured chaos as the old wording, which was simply that I had “alone time”, did.
Now, more than a year later and with the Center for Consultation and Expertise involved to help me and my staff improve my quality of life, I’ve written another list, but this time, it doesn’t offer solutions for my unmet needs; rather, it’s simply a list of problems I encounter at this home. In a way, I feel that being solution-focused should be more constructive, but then again this time I have the consultant to think up possible solutions to come closer to meeting my needs.
This post was written for the Six Sentence Story linky, for which the prompt this week is “need”.
I do hope this works and you and your staff can work out good solutions.
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Thank you. I really hope so too.
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If you don’t tell them how you are feeling how will they know so sending the email sounds like a good idea to me
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Thank you. You’re right indeed.
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Hello, Astrid. First, thank you for coming to visit me at my blog and leaving a nice comment. I’m sorry to hear you are dealing with this but yes, it’s important to make your needs known (and it’s not all that bad to throw in a “want” now and then. You may well have solutions in your own head but working with the consultant or others will be collaborative and perhaps even more effective. I wish you all the best.
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Thank you so much. Yes, here’s hoping working with the consultant will help both me and my care team, as to be honest we’re all struggling quite badly.
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“…whatever comes out of a discussion of my needs, should be working for everybody involved, not just me.”
damn! most excellent insight/perspective on the world around (all of) us!
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Thank you. That’s an interesting perspective.
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Be blessed and healed in Jesus’ name.
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Thanks, though I’m not a Christian so I doubt that’s going to happen.
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I hope you have a fruitful discussion and resolutions to problems on the list. It doesn’t sound like the staff understands your need for specificity. When my son was in elementary school, he needed very specific, concrete directions for assignments. If they were opened ended, he’d have a melt down. Art class was the worst. Luckily, he’s learned to adapt in a adulthood, but it was a struggle until he got there.
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Thanks for your supportive comment. I don’t need things to be too specific, but right now they’re very vague.
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I hope they pay attention to your needs and do things to fulfill them. It shouldn’t be too hard for them to build a concrete schedule with solid directions. Good luck!
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Thank you. I hope you’re right, but the problemis many staff think most of my preferred activities are too hard for me when I’m stressed.
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You’re welcome.
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this all sounds very difficult for you Astrid. I hope things become clearer and work out well for you.
cheers
sherry https://sherryspickings.blogspot.com/
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Thank you so much. I really hope things will improve indeed.
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