Yesterday, the fellow client who passed away was temporarily moved from the morgue into her room in the care home. I went to have a quick look yesterday evening. This morning, since I had finished my polymer clay butterfly and flower, I went back into her room and set them at her remembrance table next to her coffin. My assigned home staff was with me and asked me whether I wanted to touch her coffin, the things she had with her and even her hand. I did. Her hand was cold, which was the final reminder I needed that she’s really dead.
This afternoon, we went back into her room to pick a rose from her remembrance bouquet. We then went outside and stood in a circle with all other clients and staff who were close to this client and the family. Everyone laid a rose on the coffin. The client’s brother and our support coordinator spoke a few words and then the coffin was put into the funeral car and driven away. My assigned staff cried a few tears. I did feel sad too, but I couldn’t cry.
This is the first time I’ve ever been this close to a deceased person. I mean literally, as in touching her hand. When my maternal grandfather had died in 1995, I did pay him a quick visit at the funeral center, but was only able to have a quick look and with how little vision I had back then, I probably could hardly make out what he looked like. With my other grandparents, I didn’t ever get to see them while in their coffins. I had originally thought I wouldn’t benefit from visiting this client in her room because I couldn’t see her, but I actually did benefit. I was able to say my final goodbyes. Now I know she’s really gone.
Written for E.M.’s Random Word Prompt #7: “Remembrance”.
A Multitude of Musings 
Consider yourself lucky. I had to be in the room after losing my late husband and my 19 year old son. I have had too much death. When my step mother died it took the morgue over three hours to come pick her up. Talk about being creepy! She just laid in the bed at home all that time. Sorry, I guess this was a yucky comment but I didn’t mean it offensively. Lol.
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I really feel for you and no, I’m not offended. I am lucky indeed that I’ve never lost a family member closer than a grandparent. I am also lucky that I was never forced to be with the deceased when I didn’t want to.
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It’s conversations like this that remind me to be so thankful for all I have! Have a great day!
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It’s beautiful the remembrance put into your client. That was a beautiful way to remember her. I think sometimes we cannot cry in that setting because it’s not really them in the body…the soul has moved on. Thanks for using my prompt!
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Thanks so much for your supportive words. I agree completely about my inability to cry.
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You’re welcome 😊 🙏🏻
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I’m sorry for your loss. 😦 Death is a strange phenomena and it is sometimes helpful to get close to it. I’ve lost several people who are close to me through the years, and still find it helpful to see them after the soul has left the body to know they are truly gone to a better place.
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Thank you so much. I find it comforting to know indeed that this woman’s in a better place now.
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There is comfort in being able to say goodbye, it’s not easy though, but it helps.
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So true. It helps me realize the fact that her life here on Earth is truly over.
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awe I am so happy you got to say goodbye to the client! That is very important, I’m glad you have closure now. Xoxo
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Thank you. It is still sad and the staff reminded me that I can always talk about her when I want or feel the need to.
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